It’s Harder Than You Think!

When you decide on attempting to start your own business, you will find yourself inundated with warnings about how difficult it will be. Most people, will be like me, and think that the received advice is a little bit over dramatic.

But, after 6 months of trying to get money and collect a plan worthy of successfully lifting a business off the ground, I am not really any further forward. It is hard, without having someone help schedule things, to actually get a decent volume of work done. I think that is what I am finding the most difficult thing, being able to keep up momentum.

I think I also miss the contact that I received with people trying to also find a good channel for their voice. Apart from the obvious coursework that was at college, it was a good forum for discussion and friendship. I guess that’s what I hope that this blog will do. Updated regular it gives a good idea of what me, as an author and an artist, have to say to the world.

But, I will keep on trying. At the moment my blog is the only thing that is updated regularly. This is because it is something I can update easily, where ever I am. I have also started an actual paper journal, which is good for helping me sort my thoughts. This is something which I’ll be able to use as reference material for pieces of work. Hopefully.

Resolve to blog?

As it is a new year, people resolve to do things such as blog. It is the same as attempting to keep a diary when you were at school, except it has moved onto the world wide web, so anyone could see what you are thinking. This is something which is great, because I feel that blogging is such a great way to express yourself. It helps me do the job that my paper journals have done for years. In fact, my more personal blog over on Livejournal, reaches it’s 6th birthday this year, and this blog is approaching it’s second birthday.

Which gets me onto something rather irritating. People who are starting blogging, for no other reason than they think that they will be able to make money out of it. Like if they start posting mulitiple links to YouTube in a day, it is a good blog, and they deserve web traffic because of it. Why, though? I mean, I am all for promoting music you like to the world, as music is really one of the best ways to express yourself. But, is posting 8 videos posted by someone else in 1 day, really make you a blogger, or just a rehasher?

Maybe its because blogging is such an important thing to me, and it is something that I feel has helped me personally. I have never, ever blogged for anyone other than myself, and use it to express myself. I mean, I know people who have started blogging, when they hate writing. Is that not like watching a Lost marathon, when you hate TV. It makes no sense to me.

Most people, have not got the energy to work at improving the quality of their blog, and to then frequently update it over a long period of time. It is a nice new thing at first, but if they don’t get comments and visitors, they lose interest. This pisses me off. I worked hard, to make sure that I can express myself the way I want to, and put a lot of thought into what I post. And to know that someone thinks that posting a football score is a blog post, kinda makes me feel a little ill.

 

Maybe I treasure blogging a little too much :/

Happy New Year!

A rather delayed new year bloggery postings, mostly due to the fact that I thought I had posted earlier. *facepalm*

I guess this time of the year is celebrated because it is traditionally when you look forward, to speak of hopes and dreams you want to achieve within the next 12 months. Although to be honest, why should we only do this on the 1st of January, surely this should be something that every person does on a daily basis.

I guess, thinking about it, you need to be in the right state of mind to be ready to deal with the future on a regular basis, as stupid as that sounds. It is a lot easier for a person to deal with something that has already passed by, that way you can critique to the point that you hate your own existence. How is it possible that purposely berating our own actions, becomes something that comes easily. That shouldn’t make sense.

It is almost like a case of burying one’s head beneath the sand. It’s refusal to accept that we are accountable for how our own life pans out. So rather than confronting the unknown, most people dwell on what has already happened, blaming what’s already happened for their current stance in life. But they don’t see, if they look forward, on more than one yearly occasion, then they would find that their life would become more manageable. But it is hard for someone to look ahead, if they feel they have already had a rather shit time of it. It’s almost like, people get too scared to look ahead, in case life becomes worse than it already is. Truth be told, if you are dwelling on the bad things, life certainly isn’t going to get any better.

Anyway, I guess I should speak of what my hopes are for the next year of my life, in a rather clichéd fashion. Well, I am going to try to not be too specific here, because I am rubbish at sticking to things, which would render this whole thing pointless. I suppose, the only thing I really would like, is to show those around me how grateful I am for them being in my life. That includes everyone I know, be in online or IRL, because I have had a few struggles a LOT of people have helped me out with things. I just want to say THANK YOU, and for them to really feel it.

How Dare You Call Yourself Misfit!

Today I had the misfortune of intercepting 5 guys in tracksuits who were starting to beat up a girl. This was a 15-year-old ’emo kid’, and the guys seemed to be in their early 20s. The girl was getting called every name under the sun, and when I asked the boys what they were doing, the guys said something about ‘the freak deserving it’.

Now, the guys cleared of as soon as I approached them, and the girl phoned her mum to come and pick her up, so all ended fine. But, you may be wondering why I focused on the difference in style between the girl and the boys. Well, seeing as the girl was picked on for having black hair, dark clothes and dark make-up, I felt it was an apt observation. But, I feel I should point out, rather than Chav Vs Emo, I was disturbed because these were adults attacking a minor. It made me sick, and people should NEVER resort to needless violence.

People always make judgements on others, depending on what the person is wearing. Whilst, like every outsider, I am one who loves to put the blame onto other people, (‘It’s them who are judgemental, not me.’) its never entirely someone else’s fault that they jump to conclusions. What can a person expect, when they call THEMSELVES a misfit. A misfit, by definition, is something unusual, something which doesn’t fit or suit it’s surroundings.

I hear many stories about people who hate that they are judged as different, when the only differences they have are aesthetic. A lot of these ‘victims’ already call themselves ‘misfits’ (or what ever buzz word is deemed alternative and cool that week). So they can, call themselves different and unusual, but when someone else does it, it’s bullying and harassment.

My view is, that if you want to stand out, in whatever sense, then you need to expect judgement passed. Okay, people shouldn’t judge people based on how they look, but that isn’t something that will change overnight. If you want to have UV Pink hair, understand that some people may look on it negatively, don’t let it knock you down, but don’t play victim about it either.

The other thing that bothers me, is the ’emos’ who hate on neds/ chavs/ jocks. The people who cry if someone says My Chemical Romance are awful, but will berate those they deem more popular than them. I think the basis of this behaviour is jealousy. Who wouldn’t be jealous of the person with loads of friends, and who gets invited to endless parties? In all honesty though, if you berate someone, you need to accept it back. Intolerance is a two-way street, and just because someone wears track suits, does not make them a bad person.

People wish to look a certain way because it gives them a sense of identity, and helps them fit in with those they class as their peers. That never changes. Whether you work in an office, go to school or work in a tattoo shop, you will always dress to fit in with those you seek approval of. Now, dear reader, please don’t get all self-righteous and tell me you ‘don’t answer to anyone’, because there is someone you want to like you. It doesn’t matter whether it is your boss at work, your friends at the pub or that girl who you share a glance with at a party. It is a part of a persons nature to make themselves appeal to someone.

Me? Who am I to preach? Well, I am just a girl with turquoise hair, who is looking to share what it has taken me almost 25 years to fully understand. I have been both the judged and the judgemental, and can say that if you accept that you are one, then accept the other, because they both go hand-in-hand.

Geekdom is where I shall live FOREVER!!

No kidding!!

After owning all the available books of Scott Pilgrim, I eventually had the time (and gift vouchers) to by the movie, Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World. A film which was so much better than what I expected–which is always a massive relief. Nothing worse than having books you love, get turned int0 an awful film. And me, forever a cynic, thought that it was all going to go badly. I always seem to think that adaptations will always be poor.

 

Also, playing way too much Pokemon, and trying to fight the urge for trying to level up my character on World of Warcraft. Yes, I played the World of Warcraft 14 day trial, and deinstalled the game, mostly because it was taking away precious disk space from itunes. *shrugs* What can I say? My music runs everything really.  I am looking to purchase an external hard-drive, so that I could store WoW as well as other things. I mean, the latest download for WoW is 5 gb, from what I have heard, and I really can’t afford to do that on my laptop. Besides, I’m pretty sure I still owe Paul a steed of some-sorts.

So, I am now away to try and fix things a little on this blog.

 

And That’s That

So after all the stress, and running around, Christmas is over for another year. Other than working extra for Sky, I spent Christmas day with family, and met up for a drink with some friends on boxing day. All in all, I really enjoyed the holiday, though I don’t think it really felt like Christmas. But I don’t know if that’s because Christmas as an adult is not the same as it was when you were a kid. I do think that’s probably because it was all about toys and Santa, and now its about family.

But, as usual, it is probably me overthinking, and nothing has really changed.

Anyways, I have access to my website’s cPanel again. This means I can update it all, and start redirecting things here for the time being. That is really awesome, as I feel that this blog and things, at least show me having some level as productivity. Mostly because, no matter what is happening in my life, I always have time to blog. Actually, it is something I make time for, and I am glad I do. It always helps me organise my thoughts, and sometimes vent a little. And to me, I feel that you can tell someone’s personality from how they write and explain things.

I mean, I think a lot of people lose the interest of business prospects because they don’t show personality in what they do. Like, I have seen an Australian girl I know’s website. Her work was awesome, but her site was a template and contained a blog written in text speak. The point of a blog, on a site, is to express yourself but to let readers know you. If you don’t show opinion, or you write badly, then I think that you are doing a dis-service to yourself and your work.

Again, I have rambled off on an irrelevant tangent. That is becoming habit on here. *LOL*

Merry Christmas

So everything has calmed down and the big meal has been devoured down to the last Brussel sprout. Dad is reading, Mum is watching Doctor Who, brother is sleeping and sister is playing with her new phone. To me, it is the most reflective part of the day, where I feel lucky to have crossed people’s mind enough that they send me a message of some sort.

It makes me feel like I am not as alone, as my thoughts lead me to believe I am. And this, isn’t a bad thing to feel. Christmas is about family, and being thankful for those who you are blessed to spend their your time around. No matter what this, now commercialised, holiday means these days, it’s roots are based in Christianity, and its various offshoots. Religion is where much of society used to get its morality from.

Now, I don’t like to believe in one God over another, I have no inclination to blindly follow one specific faith, but I can see what appeals to it.

Religion is something which gives people hope and helps them cope in life. If some words, a story, can help people better themselves and treat one another nicer, how can it be a bad thing? Where it becomes negative, when people use these stories as an excuse to treat others poorly. And honestly, no religion, not even Satanism, tells you to hate those who are different to you. People hate people, no book gets you to hate. People think if they can excuse what they do, then they can pretend they are good people.

I think that religion offers guidelines for people, and it shouldn’t be gospel, pardon the pun. I mean Noah and the Ark was one of my favourite stories as a kid, alongside The BFG. Both the stories show kindness, and are good for kids to read. Take on face value, there is no harm in stories and appreciating them, but using them as weapons is disgusting, and shows no understanding of what these religions actually stand for.

Whatever it is you celebrate, hoping all readers and their famillies have a good day. XOX

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and not a creature was stirring…

..apart from the poor souls working in a call centre. *coughs* Yes, apparently I have decided I don’t need much of a Christmas holiday this year, as I am working both the 25th and 26th. I am a bit of an idiot sometimes.

But I felt I should put that creativity into something productive. And that productivity was to make it so my domain name comes up with my wordpress blog. Which I cant do, because I have apparently forgotten almost everything to do with managing my site online. Which is so handy. I think I put off looking at it for too long. Mosly because I’m scared I’ll break it.

I need to get more confident with this stuff, because its the one side of things I am unsure of, and I refuse to take up any work related to it till I have a bit more confidence in it. But that is a good thing, because it means that I won’t be doing anything that is out of my league. And untill I am completely happy with the process, I don’t think I would be able to deliver something 100%. Work in progress, I guess.

Anyways, hope everyone has a lovely Christmas.

Website-World of Spectrum

http://worldofspectrum.org

Remember the simpler days of computer games? Want to revert back to the games of the 80s and early 90s. Well visit this, offically endorsed, site dedicated to the Sinclair ZX Spectrum.

This site includes thousands of Spectrum games, that will transport any gamer back to the age where computer games were simpler. It is something that will make geeks of a certain age well-up in nostalgia.

As well as ROMs for the majority of games listed on the site, there is also a huge library of magazine and package scans. Everything, even the sites retro design takes you back in time. And if you have the time, you can also help out by collecting information for the archives. They always need people to collect instructions and scans for a variety of games.

If you have a fondness for computer games and their history, I urge you to visit this site and just enjoy it.

Falling into a pre-Christmas stupor.

The run-up to Christmas is always a dire time on television, unless you like soaps, reality TV and movies you have seen a dozen times. It feels like this year, they have thrown in about 50 TV ‘chefs’ into the mix, just for good measure. And, I look at the TV listings, and mentally tick off what is rubbish, rather than see anything I want to watch.

It says it all, that the highest watch programs in this country, are reality shows and soap operas. Both which are watched by people who include TV viewing as a hobby, and like the routine that it brings. Its like people put their brain into neutral and just watch the same-old stuff, over and over again. People are too lazy to even read a book, so we get the ‘kindle’. People want everything to fit into their ‘ultra-modern’ lifestyle, so they get rid of their CDs, DVDs and books, and their home loses all character. They believe that the ‘thing’ to do is to have it all on a computer.

I know, as a graphic designer, I should be championing the ‘digital age’, but I get my influence by flicking through the pages of my favourite book, or by reorganising my record collection. They are simple things that inspire me so much, but I couldn’t live without them. Looking through my itunes library doesn’t make me feel the same. It doesn’t feel like I can properly own something, if I can’t hold it and touch it. Maybe that’s me, and how I feel about things.

We have another 2 weeks of Christmas telly to go, and I want to throw my TV out the window already.