And realising I am totally screwed.
Sitting trying to write an essay on the history of Illustration, my brain has frazzled, its offical.
I don’t know why I leave EVERYTHING to the last minute, I do it all the time.

I am also feeling like a big blob of nothing today. I mean the state of me is horrible. I have put on wieght in the last year, because I was stressed, and to ease stress, I eat. And that just makes me more stressed, its just a big circle. 😦 Its also having the worst effect on my skin. I mean my whole body is covered in dry, nasty skin, and its so itchy. So, I’m going to have to start moisturising my whole body, to try and help ease the itchiness. And I am lazy, and moisturising takes me ages, cause I seem to have a lot to cover. So to make me feel better, I had a bath this morning, and then covered everything in moisturiser. To be honest it made me feel a lot more confortable. But the thought of having to go through that process every day, before college, is not doing anything for my lazy. I am expert at getting up and washed 10 minutes before I’m due to leave the house. But this means I am actually going to have to get a morning schedule, and be awake enough to adhere to said schedule.
I also am getting all the vitamins I should be eating as a vegetarian, as I don’t think I am helping matters by not getting the right nutrients in my body. Which was made apparent, when in early December I was advised to eat fish off my doctor, due to me very sickly. So major attempt 2 at vegetarianism, and I am going to try and eat more than macaroni cheese and cheese on toast.. On a good thing, I had quite a hefty dose of veggies yesterday. But I am still not having a very big appetite. Its odd, and so unlike me. Also looking to get into swimming more, and thinking about joining a class. Dunno what kind of class, but something that I could go to, which would help me get a bit fitter.

Sounds like some sort of plan.

One step at a time though, and the main thing is the moisurising thing, because I can not live with this itchy skin.

Feeling kinda rough today.
Had my works night out last night, and it was great. Had about ten pints of lager and was kinda wasted at the end of the night. Was good though. Well, I enjoyed it. As with all work nights out, there was a bit of drama. It was between Sam, Jade and Jen. Jade’s one of the new members of the team, and Jen and Sam have been pals for a while now. They are all involved with guys, but Jade was all over everyone, especially Sam. Jen didn’t want to take part in their messing around, so she was completely ignored by Sam and Jade.

I mean they were sitting snogging in the toilets. Sam has a boyfriend and Jade is engaged, and I hate cheating. I’m trying to not be judgemental about it, but its hard when I saw how hurt Jen was.
I think work is going to be slightly awkward tonight. I hope it isn’t, but I just have that feeling.

Other than that, everyone got on, and it was a good, if expensive night. Sky had £300 behind the bar, and it lasted less than an hour.

I still haven’t been payed from my work, I get paid on Wednesday, and its going to be rush of christmas shopping. Heading to Kirkaldy on do some shopping, actually I mean all my shopping. I have my little sister a necklace, but that’s about it. I don’t even know what I’m getting everyone. *sigh*

I don’t understand how I’m so far behind on shopping, I mean its not like christmas sneaks up on us every year. Its always the same. I am getting worse and worse about buying, because I feel like ignoring it, and it won’t come. I’ve been doing that way too much lately. Its not just presents, its my bills, I just ignore them, and end up getting in a lot of bother. Its like I feel like I’m trying to get my feet cleared, but the banks and things just keep on charging me. I mean its not fair. How am I supposed to help myself when I go to the bank, and all they can offer is a paid account, which still limits me on my overdraft.

Stupid everything.