Category: advice

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I find myself getting a lot of headaches at the moment. Nothing too serious, just a pain that lingers for a few days, brought on by anxiety. Sounds strange, but sometimes I get myself so worked up, I get this pressure in my head, and it is a struggle to rid of. It can make me so irritable. So, I’ve been looking at things to help me rid myself of these headaches, and thought I would post a few things that seem to help.

Drink Water- Now, this seems very obvious, but sometimes a big reason as to why our headaches linger on, is because we are dehydrated. I have always tried to drink a lot of water, as I genuinely like it, but sometime I do forget. Especially when I am working, and run off my feet. I have so many things to do, I simply don’t stop.  And drinking water, although it is a simple thing, it is easy to forget about it till you feel sick or rundown. Try to drink about 2 litres of water in a normal day, but more if you are running around, busy.

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Proper Sleep- Sometimes we can get headaches or become prone to sickness because we do not sleep enough. This is a thing that sounds bizarre, but it really does affects how your body functions. Tiredness, is something that runs hand-in-hand with overworking. Again, like with drinking water, it seems okay to start your day early and finish late. And, short term, your body can cope, but if you do it regularly, then you may find that you become exhausted and run-down. It is recommended that most adults sleep between 7-9 hours a night, though this can be difficult. If you get under 5 hours of sleep a night, it can increase anxiety, energy levels and cause headaches. So try to give your body time to recharge, and have an early night, you should feel a lot better with a healthier sleeping routine.

Eat Healthier- Again, like the points above, this should be a bit of a cliché. But by drinking coffee and eating sugar snacks, we don’t really nourish our bodies right. Yes, they may help give you a burst of energy first thing in the morning, but you may get a feeling of tiredness later in the day. It also can contribute to headaches, as some of these processed, sugar laden foods dehydrate the body. Which if your body is struggling with fatigue, is not a good thing. Good things which can give you a boost, include fruit, vegetables, bowls of cereal (eg bran flakes), and, as said above, lots of water. These are cleaner, and will help your body keep energy throughout the day.

Deep Breathes- This sounds a bit hippy-dippy, but taking your time to breathe properly, does calm our bodies down, and can help reduce the pain of a head ache. I like a step outside and breathing in colder air. It helps wake me up, calm my mind down a little and just takes my mind off any anxiety.

As a person who does get a lot of headaches brought on by stress and anxiety, and I have spent a lot of time looking into stopping the headaches happen. It should work, but as with everything, you have to form new habits, which is rather hard.

Worse For Wear

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I partied too much yesterday. I drank to much alcohol and ate too little food. It really is predictable how nasty I felt this morning. As a person in her 30s, you’d have thought I’d have mastered this drinking business. But nope, I certainly have learned nothing.

Luckily, when I say I felt nasty, it was nothing past a butterfly feeling in my stomach and slight light-headedness. Not what most people would call a hangover, but it is the worst I really get. But I still don’t like the feeling, and do the ol’ ‘I am never drinking again’, thing. Which never happens. My problem is that I don’t drink very often, so when I do, I am an extreme light-weight. So I kind of thought of some self-care tips to help when I am feeling a bit sensitive, after a night at the pub.

1) Relax. Have a slow start, if your stomach isn’t feeling quite right, jumping right on the treadmill might not help. So stay cosy in bed, put on Netflix or a favourite playlist on YouTube, and chill-out. I find that not jumping up first thing, actually helps calm my fluttering stomach down. And it makes me feel better.

2)Drink water. This is a bit of a cliche, but there is a reason for that. Your body gets really de-hydrated after a night on the booze, and it really wants rehydration. Don’t drink entire bottles of water at once, that could make you sick. Just have a glass or bottle of water next to you, and slowly sip away at it. Hopefully, once you have taken in some water, the light-headedness should go away.

3) Fresh air. Once you feel a bit less nasty, go for a walk. Nothing to energy intensive, but just enough to get the blood pumping and fresh air in your lungs. The whole process should feel refreshing, and make you feel a lot better. I always go for a walk if I feel slightly rough after a night out, and it always has made me feel better. I put my favourite album on, or listen to a new audio book.

4) Eat some food. I am a firm believer that food is the answer to most of my problems. Whether it actually is or not, is something debatable, but it does make me feel better. I have been told that putting food into your stomach, dilutes whatever alcohol remains, and helps your body return to normal. I am not sure how true that actually is, but it always made sense to me. Again, like the water, it is not about making yourself full, it is just about having something new in your stomach.

I don’t know if these wee points will help anyone. They have always helped me feel more normal again, so hopefully they do the same for other people. Please feel free to share any hangover remedies you use in the comments. It might be interesting to see what makes other people feel better.

Last Minute Shopping 

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

It is hard to believe that Christmas is almost upon us already. It is Christmas Eve tomorrow, I can safely bet that a lot of people have some gifts still to buy. And heading into the shops on Christmas Eve is sometimes a bit like a death wish. I have done the bulk of my shopping on Christmas Eve for the last few years. And whilst every year I say I’ll get organised earlier, it never happens. But for those in need, I thought I’d share a few pointers to getting your Christmas shopping done on Christmas Eve. 


1. Lists are your best friend- I rely on lists a lot to get things done, but feel it is essential to getting shopping done efficiently. I usually have 2 lists. One, is full of names of the people I need to shop for, this gives me an idea of the number of gifts I still need. Second list of shops I’d like to head to. Do this by looking at your lists, and even looking online to give you ideas on where to look. 

2. Give yourself a time limit- There are times where a slow paced doddle round the shops is a great way to spend a day off, Christmas Eve is not one of those days. Your aim should be, to get in and out as soon as possible, as getting caught amongst the crowds can be very stressful.

3. Visit shops strategically- If you park your car at one end of the town, work your way from your car, buying as you go. Hit every shop in sequence, and go to the areas you need. For example, no point getting caught in the make-up aisle, if you are looking for perfume. 

4. Look for deals- the good thing about leaving shopping late, is that there are always A LOT of deals going around. Usually deals are situated in specific areas, like Boots and their 3-for-2. Or, end of range items are marked on the shelf. Scan the aisles for any ‘sales’ labelling in areas of interest. Also, if you work for a big company, check with your HR department for any corporate deals you could benifit from. They may be for meals out, which could be a good cost-effective way to treat someone you are struggling to buy for. I did this last year, and treated my friend to a meal instead of a gift.

5. Skip that sit-in Starbucks- Think of what coffee shops are like during the weekend, and multiply it by at least 3. You might think that Latte will help you complete your shopping, but 15 minutes waiting in a queue, surrounded by tired screaming kids, grumpy parents and then find there are no seats. It won’t only de-rail your shopping mission, it could put you in a foul mood. 

If you can keep to your plan, and keep focused, you can get shopping all done in a few hours. Last year, I was just over an hour getting all my presents. In fact, I had so much stuff could have done with Santa and his sleigh to give me lift home. I wish all the luck to anyone who is braving their local High Street or shopping centre tomorrow, and I hope you find the right thing for those special people in your life. 

Keep on swimming…

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

It’s that time of January where people start to struggle with their New Years resolutions. Where things start to fall apart, and people revert back to old ways. Which seems easy. Change is hard, and sometimes we get to a stage where we just want to give up. The change we want isn’t worth the difficulty.

I’m still going on most of the things I set out to do. Yes, I have had a few hiccups, but i keep going. Sometimes I ‘write off a day’, and just close the door on it. As someone who deals with anxiety, I find this a good way of dealing with any time I fail to hit my goals. Shut yesterday off, and focus on today. Make today better.

It has helped me when I have had bad spirals of depression, where I struggle to move for days. I struggle through, and when I do feel better, I mentally shut off the bad days. It maybe doesn’t sound too healthy, but it helps me function. Helps me keep a full time job as well as trying to make my life better. And making my life better is all I ever want.

Main message is if you have a bad day, keep on going. Tomorrow never comes, so make today count. Make today better.

Sick Day

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I am currently on a sick day from work, thanks to a canteen breakfast and a dodgy stomach. I am an awful person at being ill, there are tears, snot, moaning, all the kind of thing that makes me great to be around. Which is why I usually lock myself away when I feel rotten. Bring ill can give you a bit of a chance to do somethings that make you feel a bit better, all those things that you might not get the chance to do normally, particularly at this time of the year, where there doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day to do what you need.

So here’s a few things I like to do when I feel pretty rotten.

1)Watch a feel-good movie. Today I am watching Moulin Rouge, which always has cheered me up. I love the music in it, and it always gets me moving. I just love the twists on all the pop songs, and the tragic story. It’s very stereotypical for a musical, but still loads of fun. Disney movies are also very popular when I am under the weather. I think it’s because I like something where I don’t have to think to hard about. And, I seem to prefer something that I have seen loads of times, one of those films a person treasures and has owned multiple copies of in their lifetime.

2)Read a good book. Wrapped up in a duvet or spending time in the bath. If you are feeling a bit worse-for-wear, getting lost in a world so different to the the real one. I prefer books which have a plot I can get lost in. A book where I find myself addicted and reading chapter after chapter, and it takes your mind away from the awful way you feel.

3)Sleep. The best way to allow your body to recover, is to try and sleep. Spend the day in bed, wrapped up and relaxed. I remember to being told by my Mum, back when I was young, that by saving energy by not walking around, the energy can be better spent helping you get better. I have no idea whether that is true or not, but I know that I do certainly feel better after a bit longer in bed.

4)Light a few candles. If you have been sleeping, then maybe more fragrance defusers, but still the same effect. Some scents, such as lavender are very relaxing, and some believe that they could ease recoveries from mild illness. I have always found this very helpful when I have had the flu previously, as sometimes light fragrances can help ease headaches and such.

Everyone has different comforts when they are ill, but these are the main ones I use. I hope that this is the tail end of whatever bug I have got, and can then get back to normal. What about any readers, what makes you feel better when you are ill?

Dear Younger Self

~ Sue ~ 2 Comments

It doesn’t matter whether some person you don’t know doesn’t like you. It doesn’t matter what they think of you, or call you when they think your back is turned. You don’t need to waste sleepless nights on people that won’t give you a second thought. Try and associate with people who like you for you, and won’t berate you to others.

Life is a bit bumpy. It is for everyone, it’s just that the bumps can be different dependent on the person. It is okay to realise that these ‘bumps’ are too big for you to deal with and you need a little help. And when you ask, you’ll find out that those around you are struggling too. By reaching out, you will make friendships stronger, rather than pushing folk away, like I know you want to. Hiding might seem easier, but it always makes problems so much worse. Asking for help is nothing to be afraid of, and there are so many things in place to help make things better to cope. You are not weak for needing assistance because you can’t deal, so go and get some.

The careers in animal care and graphic design, don’t really go to plan. Which is sad, but you kept your head up, and that is great. Not everyone gets an attempt at trying what they want to do from childhood, and you did. Okay, it didn’t go your way, but you learned from it and moved on. That takes guts and determination. Never ever lose that. It is something that most people lose as they get older. Everyone has to try new things, no matter their age, and try to follow it through as far as you can. The end result is not what matters when you remember the journey so fondly. Go you!

Just remember to always have faith in yourself, fight for what you believe in and never change for someone else. You have a lot more than you’d think.

Love Sue

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This was an extract written in one of my old journals. I thought it was a nice idea, particularly that it is a rare thing I write about myself focusing on postive things. It was a challenge I saw on some program, where if you cheer for yourself, you can feel better. And it helped me feel awesome when I wrote it, and typing it into this blog post also made me feel better. It is a tricky thing to d0, but it does help when you feel a bit low. Give it a try.

Just Do It

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

A lot of people seem to believe that good things happen to those who wait. They pray for opportunities and constantly plan for a career that is just a pipe dream.

There is nothing wrong about dreaming for a better life. Hoping for
better can get you through a tough time. But remember if you want something you have to get the wheels in motion YOURSELF. There is no point saying you want to do something, if you are just waiting for things to happen without taking any steps yourself.

Do your self a favour and start making things happen. They more you do, the more things will change.

Be Your Own Boss

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Over the last few months, I have been using this blog as a bit of a ‘pep talk’ for myself. And, to be honest, it hasn’t really worked. But, in doing so, I enable thought the processes to make things better.

I am a very non-confrontational person. Yes, when in my own domain I can be very outspoken and will fight for what I believe in. But, when I am in work, I tend to be completely different. I tend to observe what is going on, and do have the tendency to get pushed around. Which is something that effects my self-esteem, and has the ability to turn a liveable situation into something a lot worse.

I have done some thinking about it, and I have decided to make a stand. I am going to make my life, my domain, so that I feel comfortable enough to fight my corner. After all, why should anyone fight for me, when I won’t do it for myself? So below is a list of things I am going to follow, to get my life back under my control.

1) Say what’s on my mind, when it matters to the relevant person. When I am in a situation, I tend to think of something to say, but rather than pipe up, I utter it in secret to people I am closer to.

2) Confrontation is going to happen, get used to it. I don’t like the idea of facing confliction, because I take something personal if people disagree. I need to understand to stop taking things to heart, and don’t let the reactions of others, impact on me so much.

3) Make plans. Book gig tickets, meet friends for coffee, I need to make more plans. These last few years, I have wasted my money and missed out on opportunities as a result. If I have things to look forward too, life becomes more bearable. So I am planning to enjoy 2013, and create plenty of happy memories. Hopefully, it will make dealing with the hard bits, easier.

4) Keep focused. This is easier said, than done. Stick to what I plan to do, and stay focused on it. Whether its reading, writing, drawing or just general work. Try and limit the distractions which make it so difficult to get things done.

5) Find out what I want. It’s easy to sit in a puddle of apathy, when you can’t decide what you want to do with your life. You can only aim for a goal, once the goalposts are in place. This is something I have to think about, because I am at a loss on what I want to happen in my life. And not knowing, makes things that bit harder.

It’s time to be my own boss, and get this train back on the tracks. Only I can make things happen, so let’s do it.

Constant Struggle

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

These last few days have been greeted with tears of frustration and over-thinking. I feel like I am always a prisioner within my depressed state of mind, with a sentence which has no timescale. Without an end in sight, it is difficult to be productive at all. And it seems to come as a downward spiral. I feel bad about something, then feel bad for feeling bad, and even worse for crying about it. It’s never ending. Or so you can believe.

By filling my time with distractions, I have been given a good sense of perspective. I have watched movies, read books and listened to music, to help get me out of my depressed state. Sometime’s all you need is something to take your mind on to something different. Such as planning a ‘big adventure’ or achieving something on your ‘bucket list’. Something that helps give life meaning, and put the control back into your hands.

There is a serenity that comes from not being so depressed. When low, my mind seems to go into overdrive, set on making me feel worse with every passing second. So, when I have been distracted successfully, my mind slows down. I calm down and relax. Unfortunately it always seems to be a short term thing, and soon the self-doubt comes back. But by working on how to get out of my states of depression, I can control it better myself.

But this is a work in progress. It isn’t easy. In fact, there are times where it is so hard, that I find myself so close to the edge, that I could end it all in a second. And when you get to that stage, it can seem impossible to imagine any way out. But, I honestly believe that if you give your mind something else to focus on, you will slowly step away from the edge.

If you are still reading to this point, and this ramble seems familiar to you and what you go through, then I have a message for you. You are alive today, and that makes you a successful person, no matter what anyone says. So anything that you do today, will just make you even better. Hold your head up high.

Oh Crumbs!

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

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Sometimes things fall apart, and all that you can do is try to keep the crumbs on the plate.

When things fall apart, you have to garner the strength to muddle through it all in one piece. Which isn’t very easy a lot of the time. It’s just another factor of life that we must put up with, however painful it may be.

It is most painful when you have done nothing wrong, and your world seems to fall apart. Because you have done nothing wrong, it’s hard to know how to fix things.

It’s hard to accept that things will carry on, regardless of you. Because each and every person lives a life independent to one another. Which is strange when you think about how entwined people’s lives are. If something bad happens in a friend’s life, it effects you too. And because it effects us, we want to help fix it. It’s only natural.

But sometimes, the problem isn’t yours to fix. You can’t do anything to fix it, so you have to just try and ‘be there’ when needed. Which is hard, because our nature wants us to be involved. All a person can do, is focus on their life, and try to show support from afar.