Happy Hogmanay 

It’s the last day of 2015, and it’s time to be thankful for the year that’s past. Sometime’s it can be hard to find the positives, as it feels we are hard wired to only focus on the negative stuff. 

The celebrations are big here in Scotland. Every major city has it’s own celebrations. From the Edinburgh Street Party to Stonehaven’s Fireball Ceremony, and lots of fireworks. Thousands of people will celebrate it public parties, but celebrating in home is also part of the Hogmanay fun. As soon as the bells toll at midnight, people start knocking on the doors of their neighbours, to wish well for the year ahead. This is called first-footing, as in the first foot through the door. If the first person through your door is tall and dark, it’s seen as good luck. 

One of the most famous part of the Hogmanay celebrations is the singing of Auld Lang Syne written by Rabbie Burns. It’s become popular all over the world when celebrating the new year. So, to help you prepare for the singing of the song, I have put the lyrics below.

  
Thank you if you have read any of my posts this year, I really appreciate it. And I also wish you all a braw Hogmanay and a bonnie start to 2016. Cheers. 

What day is it?

I don’t really know. I always find it hard to keep track of the days over the festive period. Which can be a bit of a nightmare when you are working during that time.

Like, last week and this week I have only worked 2 days, instead of my usual 4, and that alone is enough to throw me off. It isn’t helped by the fact that a lot of the days are named, like tomorrow goes from being Thursday to being called New Year’s Eve, and Friday is New Year’s Day. And, I just get a bit lost in it all.

The truth is, that as the years seem to past faster as we get older, this mish-mash of the days just seems to add to that feeling. I guess the only reason years seem to go faster, is that each year we live, becomes less significant. I don’t mean that in a bad way. But if you are 16, each year is 1/16 of your life, which is more significant (percentage wise) than a 40 year old, where each year is 1/40 of someone’s life. Maybe, that’s why it feels like each year gets shorter, because we live more and more of them. 

I am aware that probably won’t make sense to anyone reading. But, after some pondering, it kind of made sense to me. 

Picture Time

 I have been super lazy over Christmas, as usually I go for a long walk around the local area. This year, I have sat at home, watched too much TV and ate my weight in chocolate. In a bid to try and give myself some energy, I thought I’d go for a walk in Dunfermline, and took some pictures. My legs were tired afterwards, but it was a nice day for a walk, and the Park in town was super busy. I like seeing that other people are out and about too. 

Town Clock, Dunfermline

 

Andrew Carnegie Statue, Pittencrieff Park, Dunfermline
   

  

Plaque on Andrew Carnegie Statue
  
 
Wee saying at the playpark in Pittencrieff Park, Dunfermline. Much of the playpark was burnt down many years ago, so the words are apt.

 
House of Pittencrieff, Pittencrieff Park, Dunfermline

 
Plaque on the House of Pittencrieff
  
 
Dunfermline Abbey, as viewed from Pittencrieff Park, Dunfermline

 
Looking at a very full river, that runs through Pittencrieff Park
  
 
The full river again, with a small bandstand overlooking it
 
 
There are a lot of bridges in Pittencrieff Park, as the different footpaths criss-cross one another.

   
 
The map of Pittencrieff Park, so you dont get lost
 

Accomplished

That is my Christmas organised. Everything is either already been given, or is sitting under the tree waiting to be opened. And it feels pretty great. 

Today, I heard people complain on how Christmas is stressful, and they wish they could cancel it. Christmas is one of the least stressful things, for me. I like the idea of finding a gift for a loved one, to let them know I care about them. It’s a bit of a ‘thank you’ for sticking by me for, yet another, disappointing year. And, as I get older, I am appreciating Christmas as the time I get to catch up with old friends, even just for a coffee. It’s that one time of the year, where everything seems to slow down and we can catch our breath.

However, there have been a few years not long past, where I did struggle at Christmas. Where in the run up, I felt lonely, despite being surrounded by people. I realise now, that the loneliness was something in my head, which at the time, only seemed to make me feel isolated. I faked my way through it though, to scared of letting anyone down any more than I needed to. That is not a good way for anybody to feel at any time of the year, but the festive period has a habit of exaggerating any feelings of negativity. 

My way through the bad feelings was to try and ignore them. And whilst it may have made the people around me oblivious, it made my mental health so much worse in the long run. 

So if you are feeling sad this Christmas please speak out. Your friends, family and colleagues do care about you, and may not try to help if you don’t say anything. They maybe don’t want to pry. But say you are finding things stressful, people will try and help you. 

If you feel like you have no one to talk to, there is always somewhere to turn at this particularly emotional time of year. Please visit http://www.samaritans.org or call 116 123 (UK & Ireland) for free and confidential help. 

Holidays? What holidays?

People around me are happy, as they break off for their annual 2 week ‘Christmas holidays’. I am happy for them, I really am. I just wish that I could get a proper holiday too.

Since I got my first real job at a bakery when I was 16, I have always worked around Christmas. In shops, call centres or, like now, a warehouse. All things that really can’t shut down for 2 weeks, because people still need stuff. They need food, services and exchange what they maybe didn’t like for Christmas. The hospitals stay open, as do restaurants. The world keeps turning, not like it did when I was younger over the festive period.

One of the problems with working this time of the year, particularly if working with the public, is other people’s impatience. At Christmas, people expect miracles, that maybe can’t be delivered. I mean, a custom Christmas cake or an engineer to fix your TV won’t happen on Christmas Eve night. But people expect it too. As if their holiday is supposed to be perfect, but not anyone else’s. 

So, be nice to any workers you encounter over this festive period. I’m sure they would rather be at home with their famillies, and enjoy some downtime. Christmas is a very expensive time of year, and everyone is just trying to make things a bit better for their families. And maybe, not everyone gets to spend anything other than a few days with their loved ones. 

The festive season is supposed to be thinking about others. So make sure you do that. Think about those serving you this Christmas, and please be nice to them. 

Lightsabers, ready?

I haven’t seen the new Star Wars. I would like to see it in a cinema, but I’ll wait till I can see it in 2D (can’t distinguish 3D) in relative peace and quiet. The last movie I saw just after release ended up with lots of kids chattering away, totally ruined it. But I feel that to fully experience The Force Awakens, I’d like to see it in the cinema. 

Like almost every person I know, a new movie in a universe I grew up watching, makes me excited. Not as excited as The Lion Guard (series from Disney’s The Lion King), but still excited. Just the prospect of something new, makes me excited and happy. People around me always get excited about TV shows, books or music. These things can become a positive focus in a person’s life. It can give a person, living under the worst of circumstances, a bit of light. 

You then get a meme, a small joke that someone ‘is one of the 1% who has never seen Star Wars’. Good for them, right? I mean, anyone can watch or not watch, whatever they want. It really doesn’t matter. But by proclaiming that your are a special snowflake because you don’t watch a movie? What does that achieve? Nothing. Except that some of the people maybe use that movie as something positive that maybe happened in a crappy year? Or maybe, using the movie as a reward for getting through the last several months. It may feel like a bit of an attack. Like that one thing that helped them through the last few months is a joke. To someone insecure, that can start a horrible cycle. 

Everyone has something that makes them happy, be it a sport, TV show, or anything really. You never know what those around you are feeling, so think before you share something. Because it can say more about you than you really think. 

Deep Breathing

Uh oh!

Something has gone wrong, and I can feel the panic starting to rise in my stomach. What have I done wrong? How could I let this happen? I’ve let people down? And when this happens, there is not one iota of possiblity that can focus on anything else. 

How do I react? I start getting cranky. If my work is stressing me, giving me more work doesn’t help my stress. I just go into a spiral where I just make myself feel worse and worse. So I take it out on the people around me. Which is unfair, because it isn’t their fault I am panicking. And then, I feel worse because I took it out on an innocent bystander. 

Yep, quite a mental hole to get yourself out of, if I say so myself. 

But I do sometimes get myself out of these blocks, which does make me feel better. A lot of the time, I don’t actually do anything. It is just the ‘state of utmost panic’ passes. No reason why it comes and goes, it sometimes works like that. Very unhelpful. Most of the time though, I have to actively seek to get myself going again. 

I do that with a lot of effort and patience. I may take a ‘time out’ and go for a walk somewhere, away from where I am working. Being away from my work area, does automatically relax me. Sometimes I just close my eyes and try to breathe. I know it’s a cliche, but it is repeated so much because it’s true. 

But the best thing to calm me down, is to try and talk to those around me. It’s probably just the distraction, but when I am in work, and I can’t just run off, it does help a lot. I work with some funny and great people, and I can always find someone who will make me laugh. It helps so much. Just a few minutes of light-hearted conversation can completely change my mood, and I can return to work with a completely fresh mind. 

It’s nice sometimes, to find a way around the blocks your brain puts in the way. And the more solutions you find, the easier it gets to get on top of those mental health issues that so many of us deal with. 

Good, Good

I don’t say it a lot, but today was a good day. A good, productive and fun day. 

I woke up with the attitude that I was going to focus on my work. Because sometimes I feel distracted, and that makes me feel a bit anxious about being useless. So I woke up rather enthusiastic to get my working week started. So I just decided to take the day as it comes, and live in the moment. Which is rare.

My issue with anxiety is that I tend to focus mostly on what’s going on around me, what could happen next and what’s gone wrong previously. And I worry. I worry that I’ll make the same mistakes, and that I’ll disappoint someone. Don’t ask me who I’m going to disappoint, I don’t know. It’s just a feeling I get. 

I am trying to live more positively, as a rule. Whilst, it doesn’t happen a lot, I feel I should celebrate when it does happen. The more positive and happy feelings I can create about having a successful day, hopefully the more it can happen. It might be some kind of motivation to help me get my life on some kind of track where I’d be more satisfied in general. Hopefully. 

Feeling Festive

It is that time of the year where we celebrate Christmas. Shops are busy, twinkly lights are everywhere, and everything just feels rather happy. Which is always nice.
But what does Christmas mean to me? 
I’m not particularly religious, although I grew up with Sunday Schools and the annual nativity. This causes issues with a few folk I know, why celebrate Christmas when you don’t follow the bible. Well, considering it is believed that Jesus was born in spring and not December 25th, that mutes that point. It appears that Christianity adopted the winter date because of a popular Pagan celebration, which was put in place by the Romans.
Not that it matters.
Christmas to me is about family. It is a celebration before the start of a new year, where we can show those around us, we are thinking of them. And that’s it. 
Obviously other people hold other meanings in the holiday, and that’s fine. Everyone is allowed to find a meaning that matters to them in anything. And that fact shouldn’t matter to anyone else. Let everyone celebrate moments that mean something to them, cause life is to short not to.

Computer Says No

I have spent the last 10 minutes getting my iPhone to charge using a cable with a loose connection. Again, I curse at technology as my phone dies, and I have to search around for another cable, of which I have came into ownership of a ton. And only about half of them actually work.

This hasn’t been my only issue with technology recently. I have had to use a lot of computers at work, which are shared. Like sometimes more than one account can be logged into the PC at a time. Which is handy when there is limited computers available, but not very good when you rely on the PC being fast. To do the job I do, I need multiple programmes open at once, and I must be able to jump between them all seemlessly. This does happen, when someone on another profile jams the print queue, and just logs out. And it happens a lot, and the only way to fix is to restart everything. Which takes way too long. 

So, to humour myself the other day whilst my PC was resetting, I thought of a few things that could be done whilst waiting for a work PC to load.

1) Have a cup of tea, even watching the kettle boil would be quicker than the PC. 

2) Do the Metro crossword. And that includes colouring in boxes so that my words fit. 

3) Annoy several colleagues by singing Christmas songs. 

4) Attend a First Aid incident. It’s okay, I am trained.

5) Go for a walk and see how other colleagues are doing. 

6) Sweep the floor and tidy up. At a push. 

7) Cry at the pile of work getting bigger, that you can do nothing about. 

8) Try to give ‘new starts’ directions, and confusing them when I say ‘right’ and point left.

9) Go to stores and refill all the paper and pen supplies.

10) Realise that I would be quicker doing everything manually.