Stealing Prompts

So, 2019 has been very quiet on here. I have fallen out of creating very much online. And I feel so suffocated as a result. So, I have been browsing the internet looking for prompts, to help get my mind going again.

I stumbled upon a prompt created by the lovely Carrie Hope Fletcher, that she created for her YouTube channel. I am not very confident on the video making thing right now, so I thought I’d post on here instead. I am not to worried if I miss a day or so, it might just give me something to write on a day I want to write but get a bit stuck. Hopefully it helps me a wee bit. Find the list below, and join in if you are into anything creative.

Pure Ragin’

Do you ever get hit with a wave of anger? One where you just seem to get irrationally angry. Which makes you want to shout and get irrationally angry at nothing. When I get like that, how I feel seems valid, at that time. As soon as the time passes, I do feel daft, a bit like a wee kid, who stamps their feet and whines, when they don’t get their own way.

It tends to happen in places like work, where little insignificant things seem to get ‘blown up’ to be an almost life and death level of seriousness. It suddenly becomes very important that someone is taking the best work for themselves, leaving other workers with rubbish. Like, in a normal setting, my brain knows that all the work has to be processed, so just focus on doing the best you can with what you have. But when I am in  that work setting, where everything is exaggerated, there is no rational thought. Things seem personal, as if someone is trying to stop you from doing their job. They aren’t they are just making the best opportunity for themselves.

Sometimes, I think I need to remind myself to take a ‘step away’, to go and cool down. Which is easier said than done.

 

via Daily Prompt: Tantrum

Round And Round

I am finding life rather monotonous right now. I know, that not every day can be super exciting and fun, but it is routine that I find boring. It sounds daft, but day-to-day life can get boring. And it is frustrating.

Why?

Well, routine bores me, but it also calms down my anxiety. Which leaves me with a bit of a conundrum. If I try to leave too much to luck, and ‘wing it’, normally something will end up causing me to panic. But I get bored when everything gets stuck on the same routine. It gets to the point, where I feel like I am running in automatic pilot.

It is fear of the unknown that normally gets under my skin. I get nervous when things just ‘happen’, because I don’t know how my brain is going to react. Sometimes, I completely over-react, and start panicking because my brain is focused on the worst possible outcome. But half the time, I am fine, there is no adverse reaction, and I can just roll with whatever is going on. And I because I don’t know what way things are going to go, a lot of the time I just stick to my routine, and stay away from any risk. Which is a good idea, in one sense, but it can also be suffocating.

It comes down to balance. But, how do you find that balance?

via Daily Prompt: Wheel

Aye, sound…

I saw this prompt and had to write something. Mostly, because most of the entries I read, relating to this post, were about music or something of that ilk. I read ‘sound’, and thought of the title above. Where I live, Fife in Scotland, sound is used to mean ‘awesome’ or ‘cool’. I don’t think this slang exclusive to Scotland, as I have heard it ‘down south’, in England.

I work with people from all over Europe, and very frequently, the slang gets very confusing for them. Which I feel bad about, purely because I know that I could never move to another country and speak fluently in another language. Sometimes it is like I can’t even speak English properly, myself, so I don’t know how I’d get on trying to have a working understanding of another language. I remember at school, I took French, and whilst I wasn’t the best, I felt I had a working understanding of the language. I got the chance to go to the French-speaking part of Switzerland, and well… I fared as well as I would have, if I hadn’t  studied French at all. It made me realise how fortunate I am, living in a country where English is my main language, but I also realised it made me very lazy. Like, people go abroad, and expect other countries to understand English, when in fact, we should be trying to speak their language.

But the thing is, it isn’t just ‘learning a language’, really. Every region of the world has its own local dialects of their main language, and that dialect may often include slang words. Which takes me back to the start of this… via a very long detour. Slang can be confusing, and here, in the Kingdom of Fife, we have a lot of it. So I thought I would give a few definitions, in case you ever find yourself in Scotland, and get a bit lost in the conversation.

Aye- Yes

Awfy- Awful

Baffies- Slippers

Bawbag- An utter arsehole

Boak (ie- ‘you’re giving the the boak)- Dry heave/ something is disgusting

Braw- Beautiful

Grass- A tell-tale

Dingy- Ignore

Dunderheed- Idiot

Eejit- Idiot

Fitbaw- Football

Feart- Scared

Gammie (ie- ‘I’ve got a gammie leg)- Sore/ lame

Greet- Cry

Hawd- Hold

Howfin’- Smelly

Mawkit/ manky- Dirty

Mince (ie- ‘You’re speaking utter mince’)- Rubbish/ crap

Neebur- Neighbour/ friend

Pished- Drunk

Pure (ie- ‘that’s pure brilliant’)- very/ totally

Scooby- Clue

Scran- Food

Squint- Not Straight

Tube- Idiot

Wean- Child

Wee- Little

Some people hate slang, but I find it great. It adds personality to language, and makes it unique where ever you go. So many areas of the world speak English, but there is slang and local changes where-ever the language is spoken, be it Texas, USA or Manchester, England. There is so much variation, something that is really great. But can also be a pain if trying to speak that language.

via Daily Prompt: Sound

Capable

Everyone has a level of strength within them. Something that gives them a certain level of capacity in dealing what whatever life has to throw at them. Different people are able to deal with different levels of things. Like some people can deal with a large work load, but cannot deal when someone loses their temper. No one person is capable at dealing with everything, and that is why it is important that we surround ourselves with good people, so that we can help each other through things.

And there is me. A big problem with my anxious mind, running 100 miles a minute, is that it’s favourite thing to is to doubt every little thing that I do. It is frustrating. But, I don’t think that these feelings come just from my own mind, it comes from the world I have experienced. In our society, if someone is over-confident in their abilities, they get beaten down for it. As if, noone wants the person who knows they are good at something. There is very much an idea, that people who do brag about their own abilities, makes us feel insecure about our own abilities. But the way things such as the media, come down on people who are outspoken about themselves and their talent, is only making that worse. It makes people think, it is bad to advertise that you are capable of something.

Once you lose faith in your abilities, for whatever reason, it is really hard to get it back. Like, a few years back, I thought I was capable of nothing. Was a case of, why bother with anything, as I will just fail. It is not a nice feeling. But something I learned to put up with. And, whilst I have more confidence than I did, there is still that mentality in me that tells me I will fail. I was reading something the other day, can’t remember where unfortunately, and it said that rather than thinking on our abilities to fail, we should be focused on our capability to try. Everyone can try something.

via Daily Prompt: Capable

Going Underground

Music is something that has helped me get through my life. I like, that how music can be a journey of discovery. That different songs can make you think about different things, and can even change your outlook on things. It is very strange, when you think about it.

People often talk about music taste, like it is something static. Like, how you find one genre of music, and that is what you will stick with for the rest of their life. But, that isn’t how it really works, music is more like a journey. A journey where you might tip your toes into a particular type of music, and depending on your experience, you could venture deeper into that particular journey, or you could wonder off to something a bit different.

I was a Pop fan for much of my childhood. Music was there, but it wasn’t anything too crazy to obsess about. I liked songs, but no artists in particularly. I fell in love with Hanson, then B*Witched, followed by a1. It sounds like a list of guilty pleasures, but those bands kind of got me into music. I started to notice that certain songs made me feel different, I would get meaning in the lyrics and it became something of an addiction. I would buy albums and read the lyrics on the inserts. I did find, that as I started reading into song means more, I got bored of what was on the radio. I wasn’t interested in getting a boyfriend, I just wanted to read books and draw, so I gradually turned away from the chart music.

This was the time, where I would start frequenting my local library, to use their internet. I didn’t have it at home, so when you want to discover new music, that wasn’t on the radio, you went online. I started to become a fan of music with a rockier sound, the angst and anger matched how I felt in life.

The music that I felt most connect to was old punk stuff, mostly from before I was born. I bought this compilation CD from a charity shop one day after school, and it had The Clash, The Ramones, X Ray Spex and like 40 other bands from the late 70s/ early 80s. It felt like there was a fire in my belly, when I listened to those songs. And the first song on the compilation was Going Underground by The Jam (see know I would get back to the prompt), which actually became a favourite song of mine.

Since I started listening to punk, my taste developed, I started to listen to metal, thrash, emo, grunge, alt rock, just about anything. In fact, the more I listened to, the more I began to appreciate music, in general. The phase that I had, where I turned my back on my poppy roots, was over. I listened to old albums, and realised that those songs still meant a lot to me. Favourite things, become our favourites for a reason.

So put on that played out album from your teens, and have a party. Relish in the memories that those songs have for you, and realise they are more than just words and a tune.

via Daily Prompt: Underground

Away For A Hike

Not really at the moment, it is a bit late. But in general I love going for a walk. I think it is a really great way to escape the pressures of life. Not that my life has a lot of pressure, really, my brain just has a habit of creating pressure for myself. It creates these situations, totally irrational, where I feel trapped and panicked by everything around me. It is not nice.

But, sometimes, when the anxiety levels are at their highest, I try to force myself outside. Even if it just a walk around the garden, or a nip down to the shops for some milk, it makes a huge difference. I think, that when you are stuck in one room, it can be easy for the one thing to buzz round and round in your head. So simply breathing in some fresh air can open up your mind, as well as your lungs. It is very therapeutic.

That is why I try to get outside every day. At least once. Sitting at home all the time just leaves me feeling sluggish and rather useless, which is not great when your thoughts aren’t that great at the best of times. So, no matter how bad I feel, I always make a point of going outside. It is the best kind of free therapy.

via Daily Prompt: Hike