Tag: sick

Something different

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I’m struggling this week. Don’t know if I am at the start of an illness or if my procrastination is becoming worse. I’m going to say illness, as that sounds better.

Anyway, I have been trying to think of ways to try and living this blog up a little. I love reading other people’s ponderings, but there is no harm in sharing other bits and bobs. I am quite a creative person, and I still draw a lot, as well as playing with video editors for photos and such. I’m not the greatest at these things, but it helps my anxiety when I can focus on something.

This is a wee video I did a while back, and it is random photos from when I went to Budapest in March. This is the kind of thing i welcome as a distraction from my thinking, even though it’s not the best.

Under The Weather

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

This is one of these days where I wish I had stayed in bed. I am still suffering with the end of a cold, which gives me a god awful cough, that makes me sound like a 20-a-day smoker. I’m not. I just get a bad cough when every get ‘blocked up’ with the cold. Every time, without fail. But because I do a lot of coughing, my temperature goes up, which is natural. But having an iffy temperature, whilst working in a building which is like a sauna half the time, is not a great experience. Just have to plod on, though.

Because I get so run down when I am feeling like this, I think it is important to do wee things to help make you feel better. Things that give comfort as well as relax you. So, I thought I’d give a wee list of what makes me feel better.

  • Curling up in bed. When you don’t feel so great, it is a good idea to try and find a place where the temperature is constant. Cuddling up in my duvet after a draining day, never fails to help me relax.
  • A good boxset. I am not the best at watching box-sets. I tend to watch a bit, forget to go back and watch more, and then have to start again because I forget what happens. I am currently watching Grey’s Anatomy on Amazon Prime, but it is supposed to be leaving. Something that is very easy to watch, which is what I find Grey’s Anatomy. Though it does make me cry. A lot.
  • Loud Music. Music has had a relaxing effect on me for as long as I can remember. I usually listen to different music depending on my mood. But I have been exhausted and sore the last week or so, there has been too options. Punky stuff, where they are a bit ‘f*$k the world’, as I usually feel done with everything. Or it can be something with a good beat, something that i can play loud in my headphones to drown out everything else. That is usually some metal music, like Cannibal Corpse.

I also usually gorge myself on crisps and such, but I that is something I am trying to stop. I want to get healthier. Hopefully eating better food, will help my immunity and mean less colds and coughs. Hopefully.

January Fail

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Well, it’s like I have blinked and the first month of 2018 is over. Already. And, it already has been a crap fest. Mostly feeling run down, but it leads to everything being a struggle. Work, socialising, studying… everything seems like it has taken so much extra effort. Effort, that I don’t really have the energy for.

But it’s done with. So I shall close the first chapter of 2018, and try to get on with the rest of the year. Which is starting well, as it is taking longer than normal to write this, as I appear to have made one of my main objectives of February to cough up a lung. Lovely stuff.

One of the things I need to do is redo this blog a bit. I think that a lot of the information is out of date, and it’s just looking a bit stale. I am planning to try and get started on this over the weekend, alongside studying. As, I doubt I shall be adventuring very far till this cough goes away.

Worse For Wear

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I partied too much yesterday. I drank to much alcohol and ate too little food. It really is predictable how nasty I felt this morning. As a person in her 30s, you’d have thought I’d have mastered this drinking business. But nope, I certainly have learned nothing.

Luckily, when I say I felt nasty, it was nothing past a butterfly feeling in my stomach and slight light-headedness. Not what most people would call a hangover, but it is the worst I really get. But I still don’t like the feeling, and do the ol’ ‘I am never drinking again’, thing. Which never happens. My problem is that I don’t drink very often, so when I do, I am an extreme light-weight. So I kind of thought of some self-care tips to help when I am feeling a bit sensitive, after a night at the pub.

1) Relax. Have a slow start, if your stomach isn’t feeling quite right, jumping right on the treadmill might not help. So stay cosy in bed, put on Netflix or a favourite playlist on YouTube, and chill-out. I find that not jumping up first thing, actually helps calm my fluttering stomach down. And it makes me feel better.

2)Drink water. This is a bit of a cliche, but there is a reason for that. Your body gets really de-hydrated after a night on the booze, and it really wants rehydration. Don’t drink entire bottles of water at once, that could make you sick. Just have a glass or bottle of water next to you, and slowly sip away at it. Hopefully, once you have taken in some water, the light-headedness should go away.

3) Fresh air. Once you feel a bit less nasty, go for a walk. Nothing to energy intensive, but just enough to get the blood pumping and fresh air in your lungs. The whole process should feel refreshing, and make you feel a lot better. I always go for a walk if I feel slightly rough after a night out, and it always has made me feel better. I put my favourite album on, or listen to a new audio book.

4) Eat some food. I am a firm believer that food is the answer to most of my problems. Whether it actually is or not, is something debatable, but it does make me feel better. I have been told that putting food into your stomach, dilutes whatever alcohol remains, and helps your body return to normal. I am not sure how true that actually is, but it always made sense to me. Again, like the water, it is not about making yourself full, it is just about having something new in your stomach.

I don’t know if these wee points will help anyone. They have always helped me feel more normal again, so hopefully they do the same for other people. Please feel free to share any hangover remedies you use in the comments. It might be interesting to see what makes other people feel better.

Finding the positive, out of the negative

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

So I am sick. Again. But this time the headaches got so bad, I couldn’t even look at my phone or the TV. So last night was spent in bed, with nothing on to irritate my headache even more. Which worked till I had to cough. The coughing has been the main problem that I have had over the last few months. But some new medication, will hopefully put a stop to it.

The one thing that feeling this lousy has done, has challenged my new positive mental attitude outlook for 2016.  Because when you feel like death warmed up, the last thing you want to do is be happy about it. The best thing I could do was try and do stuff to make me feel better. Most of these things were done as I started to feel a little better.

  1. Cleaned up a little, because of my lack of energy, everything has just been tossed to the floor. So I put all the used tissues and such into the bin. Which helped me feel a bit useful, because I hate feeling like I can’t do anything.
  2. Watched The Hills. I always have held a soft spot for the first few seasons of The Hills, and it’s one of the few reality TV shows I can stand. So once my headaches started to calm down, I plonked on The Hills season 1, and enjoyed some mindless TV.
  3. Breathing in steamed water. Was recommended for me to help clear out my blocked up sinuses. And it actually has helped me feel better. It helped me breath easier, and also calmed down my coughing. For a little while, at least.
  4. Listening to Spotify. Not too loudly, but music is something that always helps relax me.

It is going to take at least a few days for me to feel better. I am currently sitting on my bed, coughing every few minutes and running a temperature. But, I came online to check for a few emails I was waiting for, and felt like writing some nonsense.

I suck at being sick.

Just Get On With It

~ Sue ~ 1 Comment

I always try to a person who plods along, no matter what happens. If I feel a duty to get something done, I have to be dying for me not to at least attempt it. It’s how I have always been, since I was wee girl. Never excelled, but also never really gave up. I fail, but I bloody well try hard no matter what. 

Well, feeling under the weather, as I have, has put that ideal to the test. I have been working 6 days a week, in the run up to Christmas, making the best of the opportunity and all that. Which is great, it will pay for a fair bit of Christmas. But it is so hard to do when you are not quite 100%. My temper is short, I am a walking snot factory, and I constantly want to be wrapped up watching Netflix. But the show must go on.

I go to work and do my best. Which isn’t terrible, I can get my work done in an above average speed and accuracy, so it’s okay. But my fuse is short. I bite at people for no reason. It just means I spend half the day nipping at folk, and the other half appologising for it. It annoys me because I am such a patient person normally. 

I can’t wait till this cold/cough thing finally goes away, and I can be myself again. In the meantime, I just need to keep making sure I am doing the best I can. Keep myself right. 

I hope anyone else going through the ‘winter cold bug’ gets rid of it quickly. Nobody wants to be sick at this time of year. 

Work Through It

~ Sue ~ 1 Comment

Life is a complete arse sometimes, isn’t it? My problem is my cough, which has been a problem for a few months now. The cough never gets worse, I don’t get a sore throat, it just doesn’t go away. And it is frustrating me. A lot. 

The only thing you can do is try and carry on with your life. That’s all I can do. The doctors aren’t helping, despite visiting numerous times. They just tell me to try cough syrup and drink lots of water. So rather than sitting home getting more frustrated, I am going to work. Thankfully they have been really understanding when I have had to go to the bathroom because I can’t catch my breath. But sometimes it is hard. 

People deal with more serious long term issues than a cough, and I have no idea how they are able to cope. 

Like A Rubber Ball…

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I’m back again. So sorry for the lack of posts over the last week or so. It seems my excitement over getting better, was a little bit misjudged, as I felt pretty bad last week. I can deal with being sick, but when I couldn’t keep my dinner down because of coughing? No no no no no, I have no time for that. I like my food, and hate to give it up. Think of me, like Joey from Friends. I don’t share food, and really hate giving it up. For anything. Even being sick. 

I am feeling better, coughing is still there, but nowhere near as all-conquering as it has been. And because I can talk in sentances without trying to cough up a lung, yesterday I recorded a video. I was planning on editing and uploading it instead, but I fell asleep in the bath. Don’t judge me. I am still ‘healing’. I have the doctors tomorrow, so should be home early, and will get the video edited then. That’s the plan anyway. 

Anyway, hope anyone reading this is doing well. And I hope that you haven’t been caught up by the bugs and viruses that seem to be everywhere. 

Fighting For Breath

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I haven’t been quiet about my health recently. I find that all I am doing at the moment is complain of how I am sick. Now this cough has been here for 3 weeks. And just when I think it is getting better, it gets worse again. The main cause for the coughing has been my tickly throat. I try to drink plenty of fluids to try and soothe it, which does help sometimes. But other times, at least once a day, my breath catches and I start coughing. When it gets like that there is nothing that I can do to stop coughing. I take syrups, cough sweets, water, none of it works. I just have to try and calm my breathing down enough, usually achieved by breathing through my nose, which is hard as that seems to be blocked too.

This seems minor, but it has it’s bad moments. Sometimes, the cough is so constant, I cant drink any water to soothe it, and it just continues, to the point where I can’t catch my breathe. These are the times, with tears running down my face, that I end up in the bathroom vomiting down the toilet. And I HATE vomiting, it makes me revert to being like a little child. It takes all my energy not to cry my eyes out and call for my Mum. It’s all a bit sad and pathetic for a 31 year old to be unable to deal with being sick. And it is tiring to deal with, when this happens at least once a day.

I have refrained from visiting my GP, as with all coughs I have had before, the syrups and cough drops have worked fine. I don’t think that I have a choice anymore. I have missed more than one day at work already, and I hate missing work. I feel guilty of letting someone down. But it gets to the point, where my health has to take priority over attending work. I am sure that working in a dusty, heavily air-conditioned environment is helping me get rid of this cough. So, I am taking tomorrow off from work, and going to try my hardest to get an emergency appointment. If I can’t then I have to wait at least 2 weeks for an appointment. I am no doctor, and maybe it’s because it is effecting me, but surely being unable to keep food down and struggling to breathe is at least a little bit urgent. It’s not even just that, I am in constant discomfort because I have pulled muscles in my stomach, side and back because of the coughing. I am taking Ibuprofen constantly, or else I can’t even sleep. Which is a struggle as it is, with the coughing all the time.

I am sorry for having such a rant on here, but I don’t feel I have anyone to vent like this too. Plus, everyone is sick of my cough, because it has been going on for so long. But if the people around me are annoyed, it is nothing to how I feel. I just want it to go away

Feeling Small (BEDA)

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I am still feeling very sorry for myself, with allergies combining with a cold. I am grumpy, tired and have very little time for the bad attitude of others. Two different people spoke to me, and the spoke to me in a manner which made me think of a child being scolding by it’s mother. I felt small and stupid, and both times I just wanted to find somewhere to cry. Which is what I want to do when I am sickly, anyway, so feeling attacked by people around me was never going to help.

Actually, it wasn’t like I was being attacked, it was how things were said to me. Like that certain tone a person gets in their voice when someone isn’t worth their time. That tone that tells you a person is irritated. Add to that, the eye rolling/ staring daggers, I felt super uncomfortable and just wanted the ground to swallow me up. I really should have spoke back, stood up for myself. But, considering I only got 2 hours sleep last night and I felt so ill, it took all my energy to simply not cry. It made me feel worse that one of these people was a manager, who is not even in my department. Like, I have been doing the same job for a while, and as usual, I am finding myself stressing about how I can do my own job. I get awful panicky, and do stupid things, like going in when I am sick. And when someone speaks down to you, as if you know nothing, anxiety levels start to rise.

I think part of the problems, that in companies where there are many different departments, the departments can be operating against one another. As if the working day is one big competition. But the thing is, all departments have the same goal. They are there to serve a customer. But nobody seems to see that in large companies, its all competition between different departments. Which could be good, in some ways, like competition in targets and things. But sometimes, people refuse to help people from other departments. And that can be anyone from general associates, up to department managers. It is a really awful way to work, and the bad attitude to people ‘outwith your team’, can also be applied outwith work. People hate those who come from different backgrounds, believe different things or look different to them.

By making people feel small and insignificant, it can make people feel taller and more powerful in comparison. It happens everywhere in life, really. The truth is, that if someone is doing something, who is anyone to tear them down. I got up today and I was sore, puffy and struggling to catch my breath, I went into work. Something I am glad I did, something I did because of willpower, because I don’t want to beaten. But when I used so much energy, just being able to function, I had nothing left for when I encountered a problematic person. But maybe being made to feel insignificant isn’t my problem, it’s the problem of the manager who feels he is better than me. I know, after thinking about it, that I have changed a lot over the years for me to even think about going into work today. I have a motivation that I never had, one that I had lost when I started getting problems with depression.

I am sitting here in a very different mood to what I was in when I started writing this blog. I was feeling very sorry for myself, because I feel like crap, physically. But, the more I rambled on, the less sorry for myself I felt. I feel like I have achieved something today, even if it was just a few hours at work. Though that might be helped by the fact that I am out of work, and don’t have to see that manager when I am feeling so bad. I guess, it is looking for your successes, rather than focusing on what others see as failures.