Always Hungry

February 8, 2017February 8, 2017 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I am trying to eat more sensibly, to both lose weight and feel a bit better about myself. Mostly, to feel better, because no-one wants to feel like shit. So, I am trying to cut down on eating crap (mostly crisps), which is harder than what it should be. As people, with our own minds, only we can decide what goes in our bodies. For a lot of people, food is a psychological thing, it links together with our emotions. If we feel bad, have some chocolate.

So, when trying to stop that, and change things, it can be hard. Especially the whole, eating less food, but better quality. I feel good, when I can stick to plan for the day. Like I have achieved something. However, sometimes even sticking to plan, means that I get super hungry. I have read, that as long as you eat enough calories, you’ll be fine, just fill up on water. Which is great in theory. When I am at work, I am restricted to eating at break times, and I need to carry a bottle of water, should I need a drink whilst working. No fizzy juice or food allowed on the shop floor (to stop items getting damaged). Which helps, because I can’t snack, I can work and there is plenty of free water, should I need it.

But I get really hungry. Like today, nice healthy soup and an apple for lunch, but I was so hungry before the end of the shift. I have read up on this before, and there are ideas which suggest people think they are hungry, and it is all in their head. The most common reason for this happening, could be habit. For example, you could have a biscuit every day for your lunch, and you decide to cut down, so skip the biscuit, your brain makes you think you are hungry. But you aren’t, it is just a response to change. And I think that is where I have been today. Which is a pain.

When I am hungry, there can be a tendency for me to just want to go to foods which are have zero or very little waiting time. I get really lazy, and it is bad. It is perseverance that is needed. To push through the cravings, and try to plan more. But, I am rubbish at planning. Always start off with high hopes, and then fall of the horse before I’ve properly sat down. Happens with everything. Apart from this blog, actually. So, I am trying to use this blog as an example, that yes I can make new habits, and that it is actually a lot easier than i think.

Doomed, doomed I tells ya.

January 6, 2017 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I don’t know about you, but I have a habit of looking at the bad side of life. Focusing on the uncomfortable stuff that stresses you out, rather than the stuff that makes you happy.

I know that every day is a mixture of positives and negatives, but it is hard to focus on the positive if you can’t get past the negatives. It’s like there are roadblocks everywhere I turn, and I can’t even get to my destination. It is so frustrating.

I said a few days ago, that all I want to do is commit to everything I try to do. But I just don’t know how to commit to something fully, when I can’t find the focus, because my brain is taken up by the bad thoughts.

I need to try and change my perspective on things, but it is hard. I don’t know where to begin. That is a good thing, I guess, that we live in a world where there are unlimited resources on the internet for free. So I guess, I should have a look around. I think it is too easy to think that we know everything, and that we don’t need to learn anything else. But life is about constantly learning, so that we can better ourselves, better our lives. And that is the only way things will get better, to learn new stuff.

Just have to find somewhere to get help, and start making things happen. Hopefully.

So Long 2016

December 30, 2016 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Everywhere I look, there are people condemning this past year . Blaming the high number of celebrity deaths, terrorist attacks and political changes on 2016. Which is crazy. Yes, bad stuff has happened, but bad things always happen. The 24 hour news coverage has been very good at showing us bulletins with no ‘good news’ story.

Well, I am going against the common ‘2016 is shit’ thoughts, and think that this year has been one of the best year I have had in a very long time. Which fits in with my main aim for the year, to make 2016 better than 2015.

The big thing was my mental health. I took a step back from a lot of things, like relationships, trying to work on illustrating things and oversharing online. I spent time think about my anxiety and what happened when I had panic attacks. I started the process in 2015, but I feel like I came a long way in 2016. I still have panic attacks and things, but there is a lesser chance of them ruining my day or week. Although I have still got a lot of work to do on my mental health, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted already.

This has given me more confidence. For the first time since I started at my work, I put myself forward for being an instructor, which is showing people how to do the job. I gave tours of the warehouse I work to large groups of new starts. I joined a group of associates which tries to make things better for everyone at my work. It feels like I can make a difference and help people. It feels good doing things I would never have done before. I feel like, for once in my life, I actually have a place somewhere that fits.

I also decided at the start of the year that I would try to learn to drive again. I had driving lessons when I was younger, but the lessons went on for too long and I lost my confidence. So I started my lessons again, and it went a lot better. In the summer I passed my theory test, and in November I passed my practical. Driving felt like something that was sitting in the background, just another thing I didn’t finish. But now, it’s done. I passed, I just need to get a car now.

So yes, 2016 has been a successful year for me. It has still had it’s bad points, don’t get me wrong, but I am not giving that my time. I am focusing on the ‘good stuff’. And it really helps. I can’t remember the last time where I sat at New Year, and felt happy about the previous 12 months. It’s a long overdue change.

Christmas Eve: Being Thankful

December 24, 2013 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Every year, on Christmas eve, I write a list of things that I am greatful for. Christmas has a tendency to be a bit hard for me, emotionally, and this gives me a boost. And this year, I felt I would post my list publicly, because it is a great idea to make a person feel good.

*My family. I’ll be honest to say that a lot of the time we just rub each other the wrong way, and seem to be arguing a lot. But, I know, that they will support me when things get really bad. I don’t have an other half or friend close enough, and my mum will always give me a shoulder to cry in. I don’t know where I’d be without my family, and Christmas means so much because it is the one time where we are all together. And it’s great.

*A home. A home is a house which becomes part of a person’s memory, their life. This wee house has been the only home I’ve known. It has seen pets come and go, beaten off the frequent gail force winds, and house a family as it grew. There is a sense of warmth remembering all I have been through here. The toddler tantrums, the numerous burning of toast, the street parties, the pets, everything that has happened here. And I am grateful to have had such a place to live my life.

*A job. Going back a year, I don’t think I appreciated how much it meant to me to have a job. But it does. And it took being unemployed to realise that. As well as the obvious money, my job gave me confidence. After numerous knock-backs, to get started somewhere felt great. And even better than I am good at the job I have been employed for. I get a satisfaction that I haven’t had for a long time. And it is a great feeling, a feeling that I maybe can be useful.

*My friends. I am the first to admit that I am probably not the best friend to have. I don’t voice my appreciation and I don’t contact folk enough. The good thing is, that I know that I could turn to any one of my friends, and they’d listen and support me. This is something that has given me great strength this year, particularly when I really needed it. The thing that I really appreciate, is that despite my downfalls, my friends don’t judge. And when I feel like everyone is judging me, it’s nice to have people who don’t. They allow me to be myself, and for that I am eternally grateful.

_______

I hope all my readers have a great Christmas, and that you all have the best times with those you love. Have a good one. xx

Quote of the Day

July 22, 2013 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Fact of the matter is, there is no hip world, there is no straight world. There’s a world, you see, which has people in it who believe in a variety of different things. Everybody believes in something and everybody, by virtue of the fact that they believe in something, use that something to support their own existence.-Frank Zappa

Everyone has their own viewpoint, just because it is different, doesn’t mean it is wrong. As much as this is tolerance towards others, it also helps as a reminder when you hear opposing opinions to ones you hold. When that happens it is easy to feel attacked.

Sometimes you need to take a deep breath, and realise people are passionate about what they believe in. Just as you are. So don’t take it personal when someone attacks your beliefs. Just be greatful to be part of a conversation that evokes such passion.

Just Deal With It

April 13, 2012 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

As a person, who documents much of her life online, as mentioned before, I have the habit of being a complainer, rather than a do-er. The same passive stance I feel that many other people experience, things happen but I just talk about it and do nothing.

In some sort of continuance of the last few posts, I am still going to speak about change. Which is something that happens, no matter what your situation. The world isn’t something that sits still and waits for people. Things happen, and a person must learn to ‘roll with it’ or face being left behind, and be left out of life.

So, I guess my point is, that if you have a problem, deal with it. As mentioned previously, it may be change that is forced, which is harder. But by accepting the challenge you are faced with and adapting to change, you can open up the world of oppertunity. Rather than being resentful, and looking negatively at the situation, look at it with a chance to improve things. You can’t complain about your situation, if you are unwilling to do something about it.

Every obstruction which may cover your path, always comes with a diversion round it. Yes the path may be difficult, it may be different, but it will get you back to where you want to be.

Lust for Life

March 29, 2012 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

How good am I?

It has been a while since I started the PMA lifestyle change, and I am still going strong. I don’t think I ever thought how hard it was to make the change. I think it is expressing myself that changes most. As a frequent user of social media, I am used to posting any gripes with the world for others to see. For no real reason, it just made me feel like I was complaining to someone, and helped relieve some of the stress incurred by a particular situation.

This didn’t work. What it did do, was get me into a complaining mood, and I moaned about everything. And this would set of a chain reaction by anyone who read what I had posted. So they would start thinking about their gripes, and it could really sour the moods of a lot of people, without much thought.

The lack of thought could have quite a chain effect. So I have been making a solid attempt to stop myself from making negative comments online., in a bid to get me out of that mind frame. Whilst there has been a lot of challenges with this, it has went pretty well. I have tried to keep a smile on my face, and at least keep my negativity to myself, and shift my focus to something else.

It has allowed me to enjoy where I am more, and I feel more comfortable about any situation I am in. The key for getting past any negativity, for me, is to focus on that silver lining, there always is one, and focus all your energy on that. It really has helped, and I am in a better place for doing so.

Challenged

March 18, 2012March 18, 2012 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

So, around a week into being all positive and I’m stilling doing well. It’s one thing being positive in general circumstances, when dealing with your job and things. But sometimes there can be something which challenges this new ideal. It’s normally work or family circumstances which throws a spanner in the works, and makes it harder to see the light side of things.

This is where I need to practice. Seeing the bright side of things, can be hard when all you see is cloudy sky. It is a challenge. But I have found a way of coping with such problems. I often got depressed because I focused on the problem in hand, which ends up making the situation worse rather than better. So instead, I am focusing on on other way round such things. Like if something is causing me a problem at work, I need to focus on something else about the task in hand. So if I am being shouted at by a customer at work (which happens a lot), it helps to think about what the main issue is, and focus on that, rather than what the irate customer is saying. It helps me stay focused and get through the call.

I guess it’s just finding a way out of negative thinking, no matter what.

Converse Well?

March 14, 2012March 14, 2012 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

What do you notice most everyday? Is it the weather? What you had for dinner? What outfit you wore to work? Do you remember the person who served you when you bought your morning coffee? Did you say thank you, or are they lost in your mind, destined to never see the light of day again?

I ask because as someone who has worked in customer services since I was 16, I have always found conversation important. Of how a little bit if effort to wish your bus driver a nice day, could make him smile and want to be nicer to other passengers. Positivity is a chain reaction, once you feel it, you can pass it on to others. It is contagious. And when you feel happy, everything that you have to deal with is a lot easier.

So why does that bring in conversation? Well, I work in a call centre, where conversations are of obvious importance. Sometimes, due to the environment, it is easy to become caught up in the business of targets and such, so that conversations don’t become the focus. Well, in my bid of being more positive, I decided to work on building a better conversation with my customer. And over the last few days, I focused on the call and the customer, and it made me feel good because the customer could see the difference. Feeling like you have helped someone, is a big personal boost, and that makes things bearable.

The biggest way to change things, is to treat everyone in your life the way you expect to be treated. Converse with people to treat the situation with a positive outlook. Try it and see what happens. It makes work better and life easier. As they say, if you open the door for positive thinking, more positive opportunity will find you.

I hope this makes sense. I am always quick to complain when life is poor, but being positive is not something I do normally. So this new thing is helping
me change some habits and hopefully change my life for the better.