I remember being an eager student in Primary School and being told that I could be and do whatever I wanted. Of course the endless ‘rules’ of the classroom and having to blindly obey a teacher without reasoning, left me feeling a bit lost. It was like, ‘yes, do what you want, but not in the school’s time’. I’m not gonna lie, I wasn’t the brightest person in my class, but I certainly wasn’t the most stupid. I always did a lot of reading in my own time, I liked to try and push myself, so the idea that school wanted us to ‘try, but not too hard’ was a bit much for me. And in the end, the mixed signals left me jaded, and that by the time I finished school, I didn’t care too much about the whole thing.

Whilst I like to think that in adulthood, things have changed, and people can be more open and honest with each other, I know this doesn’t happen. The big thing is I notice that those around me seem willing to compromise on things so important as ethics. Ethics and beliefs are what make us, us. And yet people are willing throw such things aside, especially if it means it would mean using a little effort. The big thing is buying products, I’m pretty sure that everyone would love to make sure that they people who make it possible to enjoy said products, were paid fairly. But this doesn’t happen, unless you buy specialist products. People tend to believe in the idea of people getting more money for producing things like clothing, but they won’t pay any more so will still shop in cheaper shops like Primark. It means they are being contradictory, saying one thing, but doing the opposite.

I mean going back to my youth, you were told to live by your convictions, but noone followed up on them. Even religion, I went and enjoyed church and Sunday school as a kid. I loved books, and a lot of the things we did, was reading or even better arts and crafts. I thought it was awesome. Now although my family will cite Church of Scotland as their religion, none of them could tell you anything they learned from the bible or the last time they went to church. I, now as an adult tend to abstain from religion, as I don’t like the idea of following something blindly. I have read up on other religions, and do like seeing the lessons they have to teach, but I don’t pray nor ask anyone for forgiveness. But then, the hypocrisy is that I will still celebrate Christmas. And I know a lot of people, who are very similar to me in that respect.

I guess it’s all a bit of a minefield. It’s hard to deal with ethics and morality, if you have been given mixed signals all your life.