Worse For Wear

January 3, 2017 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I partied too much yesterday. I drank to much alcohol and ate too little food. It really is predictable how nasty I felt this morning. As a person in her 30s, you’d have thought I’d have mastered this drinking business. But nope, I certainly have learned nothing.

Luckily, when I say I felt nasty, it was nothing past a butterfly feeling in my stomach and slight light-headedness. Not what most people would call a hangover, but it is the worst I really get. But I still don’t like the feeling, and do the ol’ ‘I am never drinking again’, thing. Which never happens. My problem is that I don’t drink very often, so when I do, I am an extreme light-weight. So I kind of thought of some self-care tips to help when I am feeling a bit sensitive, after a night at the pub.

1) Relax. Have a slow start, if your stomach isn’t feeling quite right, jumping right on the treadmill might not help. So stay cosy in bed, put on Netflix or a favourite playlist on YouTube, and chill-out. I find that not jumping up first thing, actually helps calm my fluttering stomach down. And it makes me feel better.

2)Drink water. This is a bit of a cliche, but there is a reason for that. Your body gets really de-hydrated after a night on the booze, and it really wants rehydration. Don’t drink entire bottles of water at once, that could make you sick. Just have a glass or bottle of water next to you, and slowly sip away at it. Hopefully, once you have taken in some water, the light-headedness should go away.

3) Fresh air. Once you feel a bit less nasty, go for a walk. Nothing to energy intensive, but just enough to get the blood pumping and fresh air in your lungs. The whole process should feel refreshing, and make you feel a lot better. I always go for a walk if I feel slightly rough after a night out, and it always has made me feel better. I put my favourite album on, or listen to a new audio book.

4) Eat some food. I am a firm believer that food is the answer to most of my problems. Whether it actually is or not, is something debatable, but it does make me feel better. I have been told that putting food into your stomach, dilutes whatever alcohol remains, and helps your body return to normal. I am not sure how true that actually is, but it always made sense to me. Again, like the water, it is not about making yourself full, it is just about having something new in your stomach.

I don’t know if these wee points will help anyone. They have always helped me feel more normal again, so hopefully they do the same for other people. Please feel free to share any hangover remedies you use in the comments. It might be interesting to see what makes other people feel better.

Motivate Me

January 2, 2017 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I haven’t had any extra time off work this year. I haven’t needed to as my working week sat perfect with the holidays. It’s a nice feeling knowing that I can spend my holidays when I want to. But, although I haven’t had an actual holiday from work, I still find myself effected by the ‘down time’ theme of this time of year.

As a rather top grade procrastinator at the best of times, I don’t need any excuse to do nothing. But this time of year, especially the run up to New Year, it is natural to slow down on the productivity and just enjoy life. Whilst it’s nice, it can be very difficult to get working again when the New Year does come around. It seems too easy to sit around in PJs and watch Netflix all day, but the world is still turning and you can’t really do that. Well, you can, it just means nothing will get done.

As someone who tries to be creative either through writing or arty stuffs, I have to have some kind of discipline. I need to be able to coax myself into doing something productive, when I’d rather be doing something else. It’s very difficult. But with me trying to commit to everything I undertake, I am trying to just do things then and there. No more ‘I’ll do it later’. Later never comes around, so I miss my deadline I set myself, and then everything goes wayward as i can’t see the point if I have already messed up.

At this moment I have a wee list in my head of things I’d like to do today. Like, read a chapter of a new book, write this entry, empty the bin… just small aims that I can focus on one at a time. And when I do one or two things, I am up and ready to go. I feel positive, and a lot more optimistic for the day, or what’s left of it. I hopefully can find some kind of rhythm.

One Word Answer

January 1, 2017 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Happy New Year. I hope every reader has a good start to 2017. Although, it really doesn’t feel like we should be on a new year already. Time, as they say, does certainly fly.

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The start of a new year is a perfect opportunity to start afresh. To set some goals, in the hope to gain something out of the next 12 months ahead. It is a natural point where we can try to plan for the future. Almost like a fresh start. But, in reality there is more than just one fresh start a year, and by thinking that there is, so many people are doomed to fail in whatever dreams they have for the year before it even starts. But there are so many opportunities to start new things, to have a fresh start, throughout the year. Every day is a chance to make that day better than yesterday. Close the door on what happened yesterday, as there is nothing you can do for what has already happened, and focus on today.

I always do better if I make general goals for what I want in the year. As I have said previously, my aim for 2016 was to make it better than 2015, and it was. By quite a lot. And I think that was because I lived my life more day-by-day, and it made it a lot easier to focus on the positive stuff. As the bad stuff used to just ‘overhang’ over me. It took a long time, but it has made me feel better.

So this year, in 2017, I thought about what I want to achieve for the year. And most of it is things like to read more or fill a sketch book for the year. Which, considering I have struggled with productivity over the last few years. So, that influenced my overall goal for the year. Just one word. COMMIT. Anything I am going to do, I have to put all my energy into it, and keep going. However, if there is anything that I cannot fully commit to, then I leave it. I am not getting any younger. No point in wasting time on things that I can’t even spend attention on.

It is all baby steps, so I don’t expect everything straight away. But, if I can start focusing on things, I might just make progress. And that is all anyone should ever want for a new year. Progress.

So Long 2016

December 30, 2016 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Everywhere I look, there are people condemning this past year . Blaming the high number of celebrity deaths, terrorist attacks and political changes on 2016. Which is crazy. Yes, bad stuff has happened, but bad things always happen. The 24 hour news coverage has been very good at showing us bulletins with no ‘good news’ story.

Well, I am going against the common ‘2016 is shit’ thoughts, and think that this year has been one of the best year I have had in a very long time. Which fits in with my main aim for the year, to make 2016 better than 2015.

The big thing was my mental health. I took a step back from a lot of things, like relationships, trying to work on illustrating things and oversharing online. I spent time think about my anxiety and what happened when I had panic attacks. I started the process in 2015, but I feel like I came a long way in 2016. I still have panic attacks and things, but there is a lesser chance of them ruining my day or week. Although I have still got a lot of work to do on my mental health, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted already.

This has given me more confidence. For the first time since I started at my work, I put myself forward for being an instructor, which is showing people how to do the job. I gave tours of the warehouse I work to large groups of new starts. I joined a group of associates which tries to make things better for everyone at my work. It feels like I can make a difference and help people. It feels good doing things I would never have done before. I feel like, for once in my life, I actually have a place somewhere that fits.

I also decided at the start of the year that I would try to learn to drive again. I had driving lessons when I was younger, but the lessons went on for too long and I lost my confidence. So I started my lessons again, and it went a lot better. In the summer I passed my theory test, and in November I passed my practical. Driving felt like something that was sitting in the background, just another thing I didn’t finish. But now, it’s done. I passed, I just need to get a car now.

So yes, 2016 has been a successful year for me. It has still had it’s bad points, don’t get me wrong, but I am not giving that my time. I am focusing on the ‘good stuff’. And it really helps. I can’t remember the last time where I sat at New Year, and felt happy about the previous 12 months. It’s a long overdue change.

That’s That Then

December 27, 2016 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

So Christmas is done for another year. Usually there is a ‘come down’ after Christmas, as that big day that we have been building towards is over. And it feels strange that I don’t feel that usual ‘come down’.

My focus this year was on having time to chill out and spend the time with family. And it has been an unreserved success. Christmas this year, has been about spreading joy, making people laugh and generally being happy. Making others happy gives such an adrenaline rush. I feel I have not made the best of the festive season before, as I have got too worked up about the material things. Losing sleep if someone would actually like the gift I had bought them. But that doesn’t really matter. This year it was more about the giving rather than the actual gift. And that helped me relax this year.

I spent days in work singing Christmas songs and helping to give a Christmas treat to workers (see below). And it made everything so much more enjoyable. All because it made other people smile or laugh.

My whole experience of Christmas has been a new one this year, and it has felt like more than just one day. It has been a happy few weeks, and I have massively enjoyed it.

I went through a phase for quite a few years where I felt Christmas was a waste of time. Just there to make more money for shops. By changing my thinking slightly, that Christmas is about the people around you, I have ended up enjoying everything more. You can buy something from Poundland, and if has the right intent behind it, the gift can be as appreciated as something costing a lot of money. And it has taken me too long to realise that.

I hope anyone reading this had a great Christmas weekend, and enjoyed a bit of downtime with those who mean most to you.

Last Minute Shopping

December 23, 2016 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

It is hard to believe that Christmas is almost upon us already. It is Christmas Eve tomorrow, I can safely bet that a lot of people have some gifts still to buy. And heading into the shops on Christmas Eve is sometimes a bit like a death wish. I have done the bulk of my shopping on Christmas Eve for the last few years. And whilst every year I say I’ll get organised earlier, it never happens. But for those in need, I thought I’d share a few pointers to getting your Christmas shopping done on Christmas Eve.

1. Lists are your best friend- I rely on lists a lot to get things done, but feel it is essential to getting shopping done efficiently. I usually have 2 lists. One, is full of names of the people I need to shop for, this gives me an idea of the number of gifts I still need. Second list of shops I’d like to head to. Do this by looking at your lists, and even looking online to give you ideas on where to look.

2. Give yourself a time limit- There are times where a slow paced doddle round the shops is a great way to spend a day off, Christmas Eve is not one of those days. Your aim should be, to get in and out as soon as possible, as getting caught amongst the crowds can be very stressful.

3. Visit shops strategically- If you park your car at one end of the town, work your way from your car, buying as you go. Hit every shop in sequence, and go to the areas you need. For example, no point getting caught in the make-up aisle, if you are looking for perfume.

4. Look for deals- the good thing about leaving shopping late, is that there are always A LOT of deals going around. Usually deals are situated in specific areas, like Boots and their 3-for-2. Or, end of range items are marked on the shelf. Scan the aisles for any ‘sales’ labelling in areas of interest. Also, if you work for a big company, check with your HR department for any corporate deals you could benifit from. They may be for meals out, which could be a good cost-effective way to treat someone you are struggling to buy for. I did this last year, and treated my friend to a meal instead of a gift.

5. Skip that sit-in Starbucks- Think of what coffee shops are like during the weekend, and multiply it by at least 3. You might think that Latte will help you complete your shopping, but 15 minutes waiting in a queue, surrounded by tired screaming kids, grumpy parents and then find there are no seats. It won’t only de-rail your shopping mission, it could put you in a foul mood.

If you can keep to your plan, and keep focused, you can get shopping all done in a few hours. Last year, I was just over an hour getting all my presents. In fact, I had so much stuff could have done with Santa and his sleigh to give me lift home. I wish all the luck to anyone who is braving their local High Street or shopping centre tomorrow, and I hope you find the right thing for those special people in your life.

Meaning of My Christmas

December 21, 2016December 21, 2016 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

It’s the week of Christmas. That time of the year which is filled with good feelings, twinkly lights and gifts for those who mean the most to you. It is a period which has always made me happy. As a child, that may have been mostly because of presents, but that has changed as I have got older. The festive period has become more about taking time away from work, spending time with family and meeting with friends we maybe don’t see as much as we should.

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The meaning of Christmas, is supposed to be focused on the Nativity. Something that I liked as a child, when I attended Sunday School. The best thing about Sunday School at Christmas, was that I got a book as a gift. I loved books, and books as presents was right up my alley. I don’t have any particular negative feelings about my experience with the Church. In fact, I did crafts every week and read stories, it was perfect for me. But, then I got a little older, and decided that I wanted to go horse riding every Sunday morning instead. And, that was the start of me finding out my own mind.

When at Sunday School, we were always told that we could pray, if we had problems. Unfortunately, the problems of the stereotypical teenager came into play, and praying didn’t help. It was this idea, that the answers would be given to us if we prayed. It isn’t really that simple, and all it did was confuse my already confused brain, more. So I tried to find another way to help ease my tensions, which involved writing things down, drawing or reading a few chapters of a book. I picked up hobbies, that really helped. And, as I started to learn and experience new things, I kind of stopped trusting in an ‘ultimate power’. Nothing bad about people who do believe, but I just couldn’t get past what I thought.

Why do I still celebrate Christmas?

Well, I still like the stories, they are stories from my childhood that still make me smile. I like the idea that a couple struggling for shelter, would get help from a complete stranger. It doesn’t really seem to happen in life, but people can be good to each other. But life has taught me, that good behaviour isn’t exclusive to a religion. I like the festive time because it is a time I get to spend with my family. It is the one time of the year, where we are allowed a little ‘down time’, and appreciate what we have. No work, just a lazy day at home with my family, where we do very little. I get to buy presents for people, and whilst it seems awful capitalist, I feel like gifts help show people I appreciate them. They are a ‘thank you’.

We do not get a lot of opportunity to shut off from the world, and it is nice to have the opportunity to do so.

Appologies as this has become more of a ramble than I intended. But a lot of people, don’t understand that people can enjoy Christmas, without being overly religious. It is my personal thoughts, and I don’t intend to offend anyone. If you celebrate a religious holiday during this festive period, I hope you have the best time. Everyone has to believe in something to get them through life. I just prefer to believe in the goodness of people. Happy Holidays.

To Share Or Not To Share

December 12, 2016 ~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I really haven’t had much to say, which I haven’t posted in almost a month. Well there are things that are in my head, but no anything I particularly want to voice on the internet in a public way. In fact I just haven’t mentioned things at all. This sounds a little bit strange, especially coming from someone who uses blogging and the internet to work out their frustrations, but it is true. What it has done, is make sections of the internet, completely separate from what has been going on offline.

And I think that it is important, knowing where to draw the line with posting personal things online. Like, I have always used the internet to vent, to let out those annoying wee things that grate on me. But, I will not go into discussing a bad situation where someone else is involved. It could be to do with family or friends, but it is for me to share something, that whilst personal to me, is also personal to them. I mean, if other people are like me, my parent’s have me on facebook. The last thing I would need is someone talking about a personal situation that had me tagged, and that my parents could read, especially as it may be something that I didn’t want to share with them.

But, that is one of the best things about the internet. You can decide what you share. You might might be obnoxious and funny, but through Facebook you are simply funny, due to not sharing absolutely everything about yourself. It can be dangerous too, as you may never truly know someone you are friends with online. You can only virtually know whatever side of their personality, a person is willing to share.

When I write things on my social media accounts, sometimes I feel bad for the people who follow me. Because I can get so wound up and angsty, and they may never know why. I’ll just post those annoyingly vague updates about ‘some people are dicks’, and leave it like that. I know it is annoying, but sometimes, my anxiety gets me worked up over nothing and I need to vent. That is why there are sometimes no specifics about a situation, just that I am feeling crap, going to buy a cat and live in solitary confinement for the rest of my life.

I have been training myself to kind of push past any feelings of anxiety. Like, to allow myself to cry my eyes out over what ever non-event I am panicking irrationally over, but then when calm afterwards, pick up a book or listen to music. I do things that make me feel better. And then I can try and get things done (sometimes successful, sometimes not). These actions maybe don’t sound like something that require training, but it did. For years I would have a panic attack, and dwell on the cause for days. Causing more panic attacks, and a general feeling of complete loss. I have spent 2016 teaching myself how to power through the tears and the struggling to breathe. And whilst I still have A LOT of anxiety problems, it is a lot rarer these days, that I will lose a complete weekend to endless panicking over everything.

If I post every little panic attack I have, I think I would have no friends left. Even less, if they knew what I had panicked over. So sometimes, it is good not to share everything. But because I have had a bad few weeks, I decided it was best to just not share anything. Because as much as my new coping methods help me, I was going round in circles, and couldn’t even think straight to write properly. But, hey, I am posting. Progress is progress.

New Adventure

November 15, 2016 ~ Sue ~ 1 Comment

I haven’t written here for a while. That is my bad, I just didn’t know what to say. I started another attempt at losing weight last month, and it has been not going great. It has left me a bit low, to be fair. After 32 years of absent-minded eating, watching what I eat has been a hard thing to get used to.

But I have persevered. I thought I’d take a pledge to go Vegan for 30 days, and see how I’d get on. It is something that I have wanted to do for a while. I have been vegetarian on and off for the last 10 years, the problem was that I never planned anything and ended up eating crap. So going vegan, meant I had to go out and buy everything new. Soya milk, dairy free butter, down to vegan bean burgers and pizza. And I have actually stuck my plan, and I’ve tracked everything.

It has been a huge turning point.

A big help for me making my own food, is the lack of stuff I can find out and about. None of my local shops sell dairy free chocolate or cakes, so I don’t even need to think of them at all. It makes it a lot easier for me.

A week after trying to be vegan, I feel so much better. I had no idea that what I was eating was making me feel bloated and lethargic. But I have read that a lot of people could be lactose intolerant, and just aren’t aware of it. I mean, as children our bodies are able to digest milk to help us grow and get nutrients. But as we grow up, we don’t need milk any more, we get our nutrients from food instead. I think that’s maybe why some people can’t digest dairy properly. And because of how good I feel not having dairy, I wonder if I was in fact slightly intolerant to dairy.

One thing is for sure, I feel so good, I can’t see myself going back to just eating what ever. It’s been a further boost that I also lost 4lbs this week, which means for the first time since trying WeightWatchers, I have lost weight.

A bit of success is nice. 🙂

Going Underground

October 19, 2016 ~ Sue ~ 1 Comment

Music is something that has helped me get through my life. I like, that how music can be a journey of discovery. That different songs can make you think about different things, and can even change your outlook on things. It is very strange, when you think about it.

People often talk about music taste, like it is something static. Like, how you find one genre of music, and that is what you will stick with for the rest of their life. But, that isn’t how it really works, music is more like a journey. A journey where you might tip your toes into a particular type of music, and depending on your experience, you could venture deeper into that particular journey, or you could wonder off to something a bit different.

I was a Pop fan for much of my childhood. Music was there, but it wasn’t anything too crazy to obsess about. I liked songs, but no artists in particularly. I fell in love with Hanson, then B*Witched, followed by a1. It sounds like a list of guilty pleasures, but those bands kind of got me into music. I started to notice that certain songs made me feel different, I would get meaning in the lyrics and it became something of an addiction. I would buy albums and read the lyrics on the inserts. I did find, that as I started reading into song means more, I got bored of what was on the radio. I wasn’t interested in getting a boyfriend, I just wanted to read books and draw, so I gradually turned away from the chart music.

This was the time, where I would start frequenting my local library, to use their internet. I didn’t have it at home, so when you want to discover new music, that wasn’t on the radio, you went online. I started to become a fan of music with a rockier sound, the angst and anger matched how I felt in life.

The music that I felt most connect to was old punk stuff, mostly from before I was born. I bought this compilation CD from a charity shop one day after school, and it had The Clash, The Ramones, X Ray Spex and like 40 other bands from the late 70s/ early 80s. It felt like there was a fire in my belly, when I listened to those songs. And the first song on the compilation was Going Underground by The Jam (see know I would get back to the prompt), which actually became a favourite song of mine.

Since I started listening to punk, my taste developed, I started to listen to metal, thrash, emo, grunge, alt rock, just about anything. In fact, the more I listened to, the more I began to appreciate music, in general. The phase that I had, where I turned my back on my poppy roots, was over. I listened to old albums, and realised that those songs still meant a lot to me. Favourite things, become our favourites for a reason.

So put on that played out album from your teens, and have a party. Relish in the memories that those songs have for you, and realise they are more than just words and a tune.

via Daily Prompt: Underground