Really Bad At This

Hobbies are great. They are small things that can make daily life a bit more bearable. Can give a person something positive to focus on.

Over the years, I have had quite a few hobbies. At school there was a lot of sports and many trips to my local library for so many books. As I got older, and the normal teenage insecurities grabbed hold, I found myself focusing on more indoor tasks. I would write, draw and read a lot. Usually, I would be avoiding to do things, but these hobbies helped make me so happy.

Unfortunately, as my mental health started to decline, so did my ability to enjoy these hobbies. Most people would tell me to move on, find something else that interests me. But, I don’t know what else interests me. My attention span is currently soo rubbish, that I can’t seem to ‘get into’ anything. It feels like being surrounded by brick walls, where I end up simply throwing myself on the couch to watch tv.

I have recently made some progress, where I have found that audiobooks, something that I have never really bothered with previously. I have listened to books when I have been out for a walk, in my car, and just before I go to bed. My anxiety has caused me to struggle with sleep and half an hour listening to a book gets me ready for bed. And I am sleeping so much better, since I started putting aside the time to listen to something.

I won’t give up on doing the things I love, it is just going to take work to get it to be doable in my daily life again.

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