So still going strong. I am feeling a bit low today, but I am focusing on topics that make me happy. I am aware that over the next month or so, as I do this project thing, I know there is maybe a lack of substance of my input. This isn’t something I feel I should have to apologise for, as this is something important to me and my development.
The main reason I decided to do this, is because I have recently been talking about how a person can’t complain about their situation, if they don’t try anything to try and fix it. So, in keeping with that thought, I decided to try and kick my negative attitude to the curb. Depression is something that I have struggled with for most of my adult life, albeit in varying levels. I started thinking that part of the issue was that my brain was trained to think bad of life. I mean everywhere you go, someone is moaning about something, and that has to have an effect on you.
So the PMA thing is really about retraining yourself, in how you think. It is harder than what you may think. It’s like, if you are faced with a negative situation, you have to try and look at a positive about that situation. I’ll be honest, it isn’t something that comes easy to me, as over the years I find that I have become a cynic about everything. So, I am really having to work hard on this.
I really do think, that even after just 5 days, I am getting a little bit more optimistic. I am finding it easier to get up and do things, rather than lying in bed thinking ‘what’s the point’. And that is a huge improvement for me. I know I am gonna have days where I may find it impossible to be positive, but I just need to keep faith, that it will pick up again, and keep my head up.