Tag: life

Initial Aspirations

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

When I started this blog, I had many ideas and thoughts of what I would use it for. It would be a creative blog, where I would post images of what I had made, and use it as a promotional tour for my business. In retrospect, I think I aimed a little high.

Firstly because being at college, and struggling through a few years of forced creativity, has lead to me going from one artistic mental block, to another. Secondly, I just am far too scatter brained to make my blog about one thing. I maybe should organise it better, but nothing in my life is very organised, so it maybe wouldn’t reflect ME if it wasn’t a bit of a mess. Some excuse, right?

I have always been an over thinker. A person who seeks importance in the most stupid and trivial things. My interests in things can get intense, but will also suddenly wane after a short period of time. I want to express my love and experience so many different things, that I always find myself looking for ‘something else’. Whilst some things such as favourite bands, movies and books will stay with me, I can’t exclusively care about a favourite thing. I think that liking new things can be a challenge, a challenge that should be welcomed.

Because I try to be interested in so many different things, I find that what I want to talk about changes every day. One day I will want to talk about Benji Madden sneaking into Scotland without my knowledge, the next day I’ll be talking about some political land mine. Whilst this leads to me being very sporadic, I like the idea that I have a place to express my thoughts in a accessible manner.

So whilst my initial plans for this blog haven’t come true, I still am happy with it. I have made this blog my online ‘home’ for the last few years, and I have become very attached to it. I find that WordPress is a great blog host, and find that is the best managed blogging site on the net. Trust me, I have tried almost every blogging site going. I like everything from the multiple platforms you can blog from, to the twitter feed. I think that the simplicity of using the service, has been crucial for me staying here for so long.

I guess I am feeling very retrospective. Whilst the majority of people I know say I waste my time writing a blog, I will always scoff in their faces. If a person has the freedom to express themselves without fear, no matter how they do it, they will never waste their time.

The Idea Of Deserve

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Some people work for every little thing they get, and some thing that they should be gifted things without work. After some thought on the topic, I was left wondering about how everyone has some kind of expectancy that they feel that they should be entitled to. But are we entitled to all we thing we deserve?

 I started thinking about this topic, after a discussion I had via Twitter, where a discussion on the Royal family, ended up with comments of ‘they don’t deserve the luxuries they have’. It made me wonder, who is anyone, to decide, whether someone is deserving of a certain lifestyle. Do homeless people deserve to rot, because they are possibly drug addicts and are responsible for the mess they find themselves in?

I like to think that people are responsible for what happens in their lives. That, what life you lead, is decided by the actions that you do. And by that belief, I have to do any task to the maximum of my capabilities. If I don’t try at something, I feel that I can’t complain if it all goes wrong, and I don’t get the result I want.

I find that a lot of people don’t work at something, so they look at others, who are ‘better off’ than themselves, and berate them. Say that they are not worthy for the privileges that they have. These insults don’t change anything, the privileged person is still privileged, and the insulter just ends up bitter about their own situation. So complaining about those with more than you, is counter-productive. It does nothing, but make a person feel worse about their own life.

Another point about people’s ‘observance’ of those more privileged people, is that most of the time, the observer knows nothing about the person they berate. They have no idea what that person does day-to-day, or what they get in return. It is a pointless and wrong observation.

More people need to be concerned more about whether they reach their potential, rather than complaining about others. If you put all your energy making yourself successful, you won’t feel the need to waste time tearing others down. Yes, it may seem a tad self-obsessed, and you may end up contained in a ‘bubble’ on your own, but it is better for a person’s well being. Being obsessed with those who has more than you, just takes your focus off your life. Think about how you are privileged and work so that the things that you admire in others, is something that you possess.

Just Deal With It

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

As a person, who documents much of her life online, as mentioned before,  I have the habit of being a complainer, rather than a do-er. The same passive stance I feel that many other people experience, things happen but I just talk about it and do nothing.

In some sort of continuance of the last few posts, I am still going to speak about change. Which is something that happens, no matter what your situation. The world isn’t something that sits still and waits for people. Things happen, and a person must learn to ‘roll with it’ or face being left behind, and be left out of life.

So, I guess my point is, that if you have a problem, deal with it. As mentioned previously, it may be change that is forced, which is harder. But by accepting the challenge you are faced with and adapting to change, you can open up the world of oppertunity. Rather than being resentful, and looking negatively at the situation, look at it with a chance to improve things. You can’t complain about your situation, if you are unwilling to do something about it.

Every obstruction which may cover your path, always comes with a diversion round it. Yes the path may be difficult, it may be different, but it will get you back to where you want to be.

Admitting Defeat

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I find the hardest thing to do, is admitting to myself that I can’t do something. I have always felt that I should be able to deal with things, without help. If not because I ‘have to’, more because everyone else does it fine, so I will too. The thing is, not everything is easy for all people, some things are hard to take in, and deal with.

The worst thing is, asking for help. That is admitting that you can’t do something. You can’t do something that EVERYONE ELSE can do. I know it isn’t just me who feels like this, but I hate admitting that I can’t do something. Which sounds silly, because everyone has something that they can’t do. But, it’s hard. Especially when it is something you need to do on a daily basis as part of your job, or something.  If you start hating the thing that you struggle with, it can end up being the focus of all your energy, and it is negative energy. It’s hard to get over the obstacle that is in your way, if it seems to be something you have to confront regularly.

The worst thing is, when you think you are coping with said task, and it is evident to others around you that you aren’t. If forcing defeat yourself is hard, being told that you need help is even worse. Especially when you fool yourself into thinking things are okay. The self-pity takes over, and you feel ashamed that you didn’t have the guts to say you were struggling.

I think the lesson that comes out of such experiences, is that a person needs to be honest with themselves, through the good and bad. Honesty is easy when things are good, but when things are bad,  you have to train yourself to be honest. That is a challenge that I have to try and tackle over the coming weeks, and I think more people need to be honest with themselves. But I think honesty can also be linked to confidence, and that is where the problem lies for most people.

Hating the Beautiful?

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Yesterday an uproar was caused by yet another Daily Mail article. This time, 41 year old, Samantha Brick, complains the trials and tribulations about being beautiful. She claims other women hate her because of it, but she gets what ever she wants and people should be happy for her. That is a pretty vague idea, but to read the article, just employ Google to search for the article in question.

Now I do not think for a second that Ms Brick is a bad person, just a little shallow. She has today posted an article where she doesn’t understand why people are hating her and calling her ugly. If you are going to write a couple hundred words on how pretty you are, then it doesn’t take much brain power that people will call you ugly. It is trolling on the Internet, it is what happens when people can hide anonymously and give out hate. To post opinions anywhere, you need to have a thick skin, because people will attack what you say. And the reaction given by Ms Brick, to say that she has been proven right, is not dealing with trolls, but feeding them.

People are annoyed because pretty people can flirt their way through anything, it seems. And that is the picture Ms Brick paints of herself. She gets free meals, free drinks, free everything, something that if she was just getting on with her day, wouldn’t happen. To anyone. But she flirts her way through life, where others have to work to get what they want. People who pay for every drink, are nice to everyone but get nowhere. In walks a long legged blonde, who whispers in the bosses ear and gets a promotion. THAT is the world most women live in. That is why people can’t feel sorry for Ms Brick. I mean, no paper would publish a story by a banker who says he has too much money would they? It would cause a riot because so many people live month to month on nothing.

As a girl who has worked extremely hard for everything I have, it does grate on me when people moan about getting things for free. And more people are in the same situation than me, than are in one as Ms Brick. Which is why people feel the need to lash out, for making it seem that hard working normality is wrong. It puts woman’s rights back several decades, when someone gets treated like she’s special, just because of a pretty face. And because of all this, I am not surprised that Ms Brick gets met with hostility.

There are plenty of people like Ms Brick, and they aren’t bad people. The bad people are the ones who allowed the story go to press. The headline chasing Daily Mail does this a lot. Uses writers to whip up a storm, and provide cheap promotion. She is just a tool, something that the mail will throw to the side once the drama dies down. The have got an article and a front page story out of the self centred rambling, which would have a better place in a private blog. The Daily Mail KNEW Ms Brick would be lynched for what she wrote, and they published it anyway. The Daily Mail is a worse publication than the Daily Star. At least the Star is knowingly filled with rubbish, the Mail seems to be sensationalist rubbish, pretending to be a proper paper.

I hope Ms Brick realises she was set up, and gains some perspective on what has happened. She will lose her looks, but her bad attitude will stay.

Lust for Life

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

How good am I?

It has been a while since I started the PMA lifestyle change, and I am still going strong. I don’t think I ever thought how hard it was to make the change. I think it is expressing myself that changes most. As a frequent user of social media, I am used to posting any gripes with the world for others to see. For no real reason, it just made me feel like I was complaining to someone, and helped relieve some of the stress incurred by a particular situation.

This didn’t work. What it did do, was get me into a complaining mood, and I moaned about everything.  And this would set of a chain reaction by anyone who read what I had posted. So they would start thinking about their gripes, and it could really sour the moods of a lot of people, without much thought.

The lack of thought could have quite a chain effect. So I have been making a solid attempt to stop myself from making negative comments online., in a bid to get me out of that mind frame. Whilst there has been a lot of challenges with this, it has went pretty well. I have tried to keep a smile on my face, and at least keep my negativity to myself, and shift my focus to something else.

It has allowed me to enjoy where I am more, and I feel more comfortable about any situation I am in. The key for getting past any negativity, for me, is to focus on that silver lining, there always is one, and focus all your energy on that. It really has helped, and I am in a better place for doing so.

Challenged

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

So, around a week into being all positive and I’m stilling doing well. It’s one thing being positive in general circumstances, when dealing with your job and things. But sometimes there can be something which challenges this new ideal. It’s normally work or family circumstances which throws a spanner in the works, and makes it harder to see the light side of things.

This is where I need to practice. Seeing the bright side of things, can be hard when all you see is cloudy sky. It is a challenge. But I have found a way of coping with such problems. I often got depressed because I focused on the problem in hand, which ends up making the situation worse rather than better. So instead, I am focusing on on other way round such things. Like if something is causing me a problem at work, I need to focus on something else about the task in hand. So if I am being shouted at by a customer at work (which happens a lot), it helps to think about what the main issue is, and focus on that, rather than what the irate customer is saying. It helps me stay focused and get through the call.

I guess it’s just finding a way out of negative thinking, no matter what.

Converse Well?

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

What do you notice most everyday? Is it the weather? What you had for dinner? What outfit you wore to work? Do you remember the person who served you when you bought your morning coffee? Did you say thank you, or are they lost in your mind, destined to never see the light of day again?

I ask because as someone who has worked in customer services since I was 16, I have always found conversation important. Of how a little bit if effort to wish your bus driver a nice day, could make him smile and want to be nicer to other passengers. Positivity is a chain reaction, once you feel it, you can pass it on to others. It is contagious. And when you feel happy, everything that you have to deal with is a lot easier.

So why does that bring in conversation? Well, I work in a call centre, where conversations are of obvious importance. Sometimes, due to the environment, it is easy to become caught up in the business of targets and such, so that conversations don’t become the focus. Well, in my bid of being more positive, I decided to work on building a better conversation with my customer. And over the last few days, I focused on the call and the customer, and it made me feel good because the customer could see the difference. Feeling like you have helped someone, is a big personal boost, and that makes things bearable.

The biggest way to change things, is to treat everyone in your life the way you expect to be treated. Converse with people to treat the situation with a positive outlook. Try it and see what happens. It makes work better and life easier. As they say, if you open the door for positive thinking, more positive opportunity will find you.

I hope this makes sense. I am always quick to complain when life is poor, but being positive is not something I do normally. So this new thing is helping
me change some habits and hopefully change my life for the better.

Start All Over Again

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

So it’s Tuesday. The start of another week for me. And, I have to say that I am pretty enthusiastic about it.

Why are you not being faced with my usual grumbles, I hear you ask. I guess it’s because I feel good. That’s it really. Just that I feel like I am achieving something good and worthwhile. It is unusual for me, so I feel I should let the world know. I decided last week that I was going to use the next 12 weeks (now 11) to make a positive change on my life.

I am hoping to use the period to do things that I have been meaning to do for a while, such as buy glasses, renew my drivers license, etc. I have taken to writing a ‘to do’ list, and having a copy on my phone, so I can work through what I need or want to do for that day. It seems a good idea, and really helped me get prepared for the day today.

So, readers, do you have any methods that help you get tasks done?

Considering Worth

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I am one of the many people who has grown up with a low sense of self-worth. It is a creation for the over indulged masses, whose thoughts and feelings are considered more valuable than any physical work they can do.

After thinking about it, this something that is created by people who simply are not busy enough. It is hard to think self-indulgently if you have to work manual labour all day, every day. But people in developed countries, rarely work such demanding jobs, so their energy goes into analyzing their dreams and various other pieces of tedium. It is not to disrespect those who feel depression and over analyse things, but it does bear thinking if they would still behave in those manners if they were worked harder.

Sounds silly, but it has been thought previously, that people get depressed because they have the time to get depressed. Which is interesting. I am a person who has suffered from depression, to the stage that suicide was considered. Why did I feel like that? Because I put overwhelming pressure on myself, and felt lonely. Loneliness was brought on because I lived in a big city on my own, with noone to talk to. I only had my thoughts, and this gave me time to get depressed.

Also, the developed world also has a way of looking down on people who believe in themselves and get things done. How many kids get bullied for simply doing their homework and behaving well? So, if this is mentality kids are growing into, where the underachiever is the best, then is it a wonder people have low self worth. This could also lead into a bad work ethic, where people are lethargic, which leads to poor satisfaction of life and depression. And when you get into the deep, dark hole of depression, it is hard to escape.

Give yourself more to do, you will have less time to be depressed. Don’t lessen the value of hardwork, as that spreads your depression on to others. This may not make a lot of sense, but it was in my head.