Tag: healthy living

Water-proof

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

As I mentioned yesterday, I am looking to get healthier. It has become clear, that to get anything that I want, I need to really fight for it. This is something that probably seems a really obvious thing, that you have to go and get anything you want in life. When you have times where you can barely get up out of bed, no matter what is happening, it is hard to think you have to fight more than you already do.

But this is a different kind of fighting. It is fighting for yourself, rather than against. It’s about daring to think about the future, rather than being focused on the past. Which is easier said than done. Most of my problems from anxiety, come from relying on negative past experiences shape how I believe things will turn out in the future. It is something that I do subconsciously, and the resulting behaviour has been going on for years.

Trying to make my outlook more positive is difficult, and it feels like learning something completely new. Something that can be very scary, especially when it is about things such as your own behaviour. I do better when i try to do things bit-by-bit. For example, I have been feeling bloated at work, and i usually drink diet coke at breaks. Which tastes nice, but it isn’t very good for you. So I have a new water bottle, which I will drink from all day. I don’t take money with me down on the shop floor, so I am not buying crisps or anything

Drinking water should be the most natural thing in the world, but it is quite hard to drink more of it. When you try to drink more water, you start to realise how much crap you drink through a day. And, in this journey to becoming healthier, I think that paying attention to what I eat and drink is a good thing. Whilst I feel a lot better already, in drinking just water, I do need to pee a lot more.

New Adventure

~ Sue ~ 1 Comment

I haven’t written here for a while. That is my bad, I just didn’t know what to say. I started another attempt at losing weight last month, and it has been not going great. It has left me a bit low, to be fair. After 32 years of absent-minded eating, watching what I eat has been a hard thing to get used to. 

But I have persevered. I thought I’d take a pledge to go Vegan for 30 days, and see how I’d get on. It is something that I have wanted to do for a while. I have been vegetarian on and off for the last 10 years, the problem was that I never planned anything and ended up eating crap. So going vegan, meant I had to go out and buy everything new. Soya milk, dairy free butter, down to vegan bean burgers and pizza. And I have actually stuck my plan, and I’ve tracked everything.

It has been a huge turning point. 

A big help for me making my own food, is the lack of stuff I can find out and about. None of my local shops sell dairy free chocolate or cakes, so I don’t even need to think of them at all. It makes it a lot easier for me. 

A week after trying to be vegan, I feel so much better. I had no idea that what I was eating was making me feel bloated and lethargic. But I have read that a lot of people could be lactose intolerant, and just aren’t aware of it. I mean, as children our bodies are able to digest milk to help us grow and get nutrients. But as we grow up, we don’t need milk any more, we get our nutrients from food instead. I think that’s maybe why some people can’t digest dairy properly. And because of how good I feel not having dairy, I wonder if I was in fact slightly intolerant to dairy. 

One thing is for sure, I feel so good, I can’t see myself going back to just eating what ever. It’s been a further boost that I also lost 4lbs this week, which means for the first time since trying WeightWatchers, I have lost weight. 

A bit of success is nice. 🙂 

Where To Lean?

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Everyone has their own problems in life, and as much as we try to keep things to ourselves, we have to rely on other people every now and then. We need support of those around us to help us keep going in times of hardship. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, to look around us in times of hardship, for reassurance and guidance.

But what do you do when you look around you, and can’t find that moral support that you need?

We live in a world where we can easily become surrounded in gadgets and gizmos rather than people, and we don’t realise how alienating it can be. I only noticed that recently when a person around has decided to make a change, and got all the support she needed. But when had previously turned to them for help, I was kind of ignored. I kind of felt rejected. And then my anxiety decides to have it’s say. I mean, maybe I can’t find the support because everything I have tried before, I have failed at. When I start thinking like that. I don’t want to ever try anything new again. And it’s upsetting.

When I first started having problems with anxiety and depression, I really couldn’t feel like I could turn to anyone around me. That’s where the internet has come in use. I found a place where I could rant and rave, and I felt like I wasn’t imposing my issues on anyone else. I feel that I have a lot of stuff to deal with, and sometimes it would be nice to have someone to turn to. A person to share stuff with, but everyone else has their own lives and issues, I don’t want to weigh them down with my drama.

Change For Life?

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

For as long as I can remember I have always been on the heavier side of life. When I was little I was always told I looked like a wee rugby player, something that never bothered me at the time, because I quite liked rugby. As I got older, the comments got a bit harsher. All comments made towards me, seemed to be about my weight. Something that I did my best to ignore, I was fairly active (so I told myself) so I couldn’t be that fat. I ignored it, and invested my time in doing what I wanted, eating what I wanted and enjoying myself. Which there is nothing wrong with, the problem is knowing where to stop. I didn’t.

When I was at school I got my first job, a paper round that gave me less than a £5 a week. Wasn’t a lot, but it was my money. I spent it on magazines and crap food. I’d quite happily spend my hard earned money on multipacks of 6 packs crisps, which I’d sometimes eat in one day. It gave me a sense of control, which was needed as school, something I was always good at, started to go downhill. I was struggling, and all my friends seemed fine. Eating would take my mind off thinking about being a failure, and I didn’t have to bother anyone. As I have got older, food has been there out of habit. When there was something I couldn’t talk about that was bothering me, I’d scoff junk food and wash it down with fizzy juice. And the more money I have, the more junk I buy.

Why am I saying all this? Well, I was watching a health program last night, where people were weighing themselves to see how overweight they were. Now, I have weighed myself fairly inconsistently over the last 6 months or so, but the numbers were numbers, and I made no real connection with it. I mean, what has a kilo done for me? But I was intrigued and weighed myself, to see what ‘weight class’ I came in. At 5 foot 2, I weigh 103 kg.That makes me OBESE. It’s kind of slapped me in the face a bit. I knew I was fat, always chubby, but never thought obese. After a cry to myself, I spent last night browsing the effects of obesity, and what it does to your body. Well, two things were highlighted straight away to me. First, obesity can cause muscle pain and inflammation, something I have dealt with FOR YEARS. Secondly, a bad diet can have detrimental effects on your body’s ability to fight bugs, and the bad stuff. I have been suffering with various illnesses over the last 6 months, which could have something to do with a poor immune system.

As a bigger girl, I have always been against a certain figure being the aim for every woman out there. Every person has their own shape. And that’s okay. But, the moment your body starts rebelling against whatever life choices you have made, you should listen and change few things. And that’s all I want to do, change a few things. My body isn’t very happy. I have the complaints of joint pain and a cough that just won’t leave, and I also have no energy after a shift at work. It’s getting to the stage that I feel like I am missing out on life, because I can’t be bothered doing anything. And of course my anxiety then jumps in, and convinces me that if I can’t be bothered with myself, why should anyone else. And that is how I devour several packets of crisps instead.

What if losing weight does help my health issues, like my mental health? I know it won’t solve every problem, but maybe it could make things easier. I just haven’t been able to relax since I read about being obese. It’s no one’s fault but my own, I accept that. So if I am to try and fix it, I need to take full ownership in that too. I am back using the Weight Watcher online tracker, and going to see how that works.

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I wanted to talk about this on here, as this blog has been a good way of helping me through problems previously. So because this has been something stuck in my head, I thought I’d write about. Hopefully documenting my feelings in such a way will help keep me moving. Fingers crossed, and I’ll try and write down any progress or issues I am having.