Tag: gay

Pride

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

This weekend was Edinburgh Pride. I went along with colleagues from my work. We meet, do the parade, give away goodies, and then celebrate at the end of the march. Lots of dancing was done, and drink was drunk. However, I have never ever been good at mixing my drinks, and felt ill as soon as I stopped drinking. Rookie error, tbh.

Edinburgh Pride march heading up the Royal Mile.

As time goes on, the need for Pride seems to be more important than ever. In the UK, we have an increase in politicians ripping down pride flags, and cancelling events. Trying to silence a community that is already under pressure. Talking about not just restricting trans folk, and their rights, but making gay marriage illegal, gay adoption? It’s horrific, and there is no need for that. It’s 2026, and it feels like civil rights are going backward.

I have always been brought up with the radical idea that you treat those around you with kindness. Yes, we all have different ideas and beliefs, but as long no-one is harming any other person or creature, they should be able to live peacefully. We all have to muddle through this life in one piece, so if being guided by a religion, or dressing a certain way, can help a person navigate the shit show, then it should be fine. They shouldn’t be targeted purely because they are ‘different’ or ‘not normal’.

When I was at school in the 90s, I remember discovering that I didn’t like boys. I didn’t know who to turn to. I didn’t know anyone who was gay. Any other gay girls. So, I went to a teacher, someone at school to talk about it. To ask for advice. Only to be told, that when I met a boy that really likes me, these feelings would go away. I felt broken, that something was wrong. Section 28 banned schools talking about LGBTQ+ themes and issues to pupils. Put in place by the conservative government in 1988. It was put in place to protect the idea of the ‘nuclear family’, and stop children from being ‘indoctrinated’ into the homosexual lifestyle. It was repealed in Scotland in 2000, with England and Wales following in 2003. But for so many queer people, it was too late. Sexual assault, abuse, suicide, queer people suffered.

We are at a point, in 2026, where it honestly feels like Section 28 could come back. LGBTQ+ people in the UK are genuinely scared. There is an effort by the political right wing, where they want to split the LGB from the TQ+. And it is not because they ‘love the gays’, it’s a method of divide and conquer. We need to stand together as a community, because once the ball starts rolling back on human rights, it doesn’t just take out the rights for people you dislike. It comes for all the rights of every marginalised community. It doesn’t stop till we, as a general population, are set back decades.

Don’t Stop Me Now

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

To most people I am a quiet person. Very shy, and don’t like to go to places where I don’t know anyone. I get panic attacks and frequently cancel plans to stay at home on my own. I am very good at isolating myself.

However, when I see articles or comments berating a group of people, for being who they are and I can’t hold back. I feel like life is about better things for yourself and others around you through education. So when I see ignorance on Facebook, or some article, I feel composed to jump up and say something. My belief is that if someone is not harming anyone, and making themselves happy, why to get so upset about what they do. Most of the time the angriest people are angry because they simply can’t relate. And I feel that it is wrong to comment harmful words on a topic that you have no knowledge on, and are scared of.

This feels like a big thing right now, as a member of the LGBTQ+ community, I see people berating trans people, or people who aren’t cis-gendered, regularly. As I grew up, I had so much verbal abuse about my own sexuality and gender. I have always been a tomboy, and never been a girly girl. I was bullied at school, for looking like a boy. It was the first point where I started hating myself, which started a horrible spiral which has lead to many mental health issues through my life. I kept myself to myself, I never hurt anyone, and tried to be a good person. But I was made to feel like a criminal for being who I am.

So, when I see people angling abuse at folk, I feel I have to say something. I think everyone should. I frequently hear people say they are okay with ‘the gays’ but then berate someone struggling with gender identity. You either support the LGBTQ+ community or you don’t, in my opinion. I don’t understand why you would hate someone for something you don’t understand. And mockery translates to hate to a person who feels attacked from all sides.

People say that their ‘free speech for jokes’ has been spoilt by Social Justice Warriors, and it isn’t true. It’s just the jokes that used to be made at the expense of women, race, or LGBTQ+, is no longer acceptable. You see, these people now have a voice, and can speak up and tell you why it’s not okay to berate them. Free speech is allowing you speak what you want, but it also gives people the ability to call you out on anything which is problematic.

Every day is a chance to educate yourself on a viewpoint which is unknown to you. Make the best of it. The world will be better for it.

National Coming Out Day

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

Today is a day where a lot of members of the LGBTQ+ community tell their’coming out’ story to the world. It is to encourage other people to feel safe in telling the world about their sexuality. And, as a person who knows how hard it is to try and tell people, this is a good thing. And the day should be celebrated, that people should be who they are without any negative results from that.

For myself, I have found it hard. I identify as a lesbian, I like girls, and have never really been interested in boys, past that small period of experimentation as a teenager. A lot of the people I hang out with, just picked up that I was gay. Which is nice, because that way, you don’t have to cross any barrier, its just there and nothing changes. It’s hard to type this, because I have never felt that I wanted to publicise it, in any way. It would be different if I was in a serious relationship, but I am not.

When I was younger, I had this thought that I shouldn’t expect anyone else to love me, if I don’t love myself. A thought that has stuck with me for a very long time. Looking back, I think that I believed this because of my own lack of self-belief. After speaking to a therapist,  it seems that a lot of my problems with mental health and how I view myself, has come from that part of my life, when I started struggling with school and realised that, unlike my friends, I wasn’t going to achieve what I wanted. And I kind of put my head down, and just tried to get on with it. But, as time went on, my self-worth has got less and less. Which is sad.

So, I went out with boys and girls for a while, because as well as my mental health, I was also struggling with my sexuality. Part of me felt so different from everyone around me already, I didn’t know if defining my sexuality would actually make things worse. As it happened, it didn’t, but it also didn’t make things any easier. I did date a bit, but nothing has ever stuck. And, it feels like my brain needs a definate answer of why nothing seems to last, and it goes back to the thought of ‘noone can love you, if you don’t love you’. And I can’t say when the last time I loved myself was. So I have held back.

I haven’t really publicly ‘came out’ because, at the moment, that isn’t the thing which is suffocating me. And, it’s actually okay for me. I mean, who I date, or love, is something that is personal to me. In fact, there some people who may read this, and this will be the first they have heard about me being gay. Because my sexual orientation is just part of who I am, I never thought about sitting people down, and telling them about it. I think I am very fortunate though, I have  good people around me, who are very loving and have a relaxed attitude towards a lot of things.