Tag: 2016

To Share Or Not To Share

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I really haven’t had much to say, which I haven’t posted in almost a month. Well there are things that are in my head, but no anything I particularly want to voice on the internet in a public way. In fact I just haven’t mentioned things at all. This sounds a little bit strange, especially coming from someone who uses blogging and the internet to work out their frustrations, but it is true. What it has done, is make sections of the internet, completely separate from what has been going on offline.

And I think that it is important, knowing where to draw the line with posting personal things online. Like, I have always used the internet to vent, to let out those annoying wee things that grate on me. But, I will not go into discussing a bad situation where someone else is involved. It could be to do with family or friends, but it is for me to share something, that whilst personal to me, is also personal to them. I mean, if other people are like me, my parent’s have me on facebook. The last thing I would need is someone talking about a personal situation that had me tagged, and that my parents could read, especially as it may be something that I didn’t want to share with them.

But, that is one of the best things about the internet. You can decide what you share. You might might be obnoxious and funny, but through Facebook you are simply funny, due to not sharing absolutely everything about yourself. It can be dangerous too, as you may never truly know someone you are friends with online. You can only virtually know whatever side of their personality, a person is willing to share.

When I write things on my social media accounts, sometimes I feel bad for the people who follow me. Because I can get so wound up and angsty, and they may never know why. I’ll just post those annoyingly vague updates about ‘some people are dicks’, and leave it like that. I know it is annoying, but sometimes, my anxiety gets me worked up over nothing and I need to vent. That is why there are sometimes no specifics about a situation, just that I am feeling crap, going to buy a cat and live in solitary confinement for the rest of my life.

I have been training myself to kind of push past any feelings of anxiety. Like, to allow myself to cry my eyes out over what ever non-event I am panicking irrationally over, but then when calm afterwards, pick up a book or listen to music. I do things that make me feel better. And then I can try and get things done (sometimes successful, sometimes not). These actions maybe don’t sound like something that require training, but it did. For years I would have a panic attack, and dwell on the cause for days. Causing more panic attacks, and a general feeling of complete loss. I have spent 2016 teaching myself how to power through the tears and the struggling to breathe. And whilst I still have A LOT of anxiety problems, it is a lot rarer these days, that I will lose a complete weekend to endless panicking over everything.

If I post every little panic attack I have, I think I would have no friends left. Even less, if they knew what I had panicked over. So sometimes, it is good not to share everything. But because I have had a bad few weeks, I decided it was best to just not share anything. Because as much as my new coping methods help me, I was going round in circles, and couldn’t even think straight to write properly. But, hey, I am posting. Progress is progress.

When You Say Nothing At All

~ Sue ~ Leave a comment

I haven’t been updating over the last few weeks. Sorry about that. I have just been going through a phase where I haven’t been able to find the words for what is on my mind. Which is a very suffocating feeling when you are forever noting little things down, and all of a sudden nothing seems to happen. I have been sitting with a pen in my hand, or with a blog post open, and nothing happened.

It’s not that things haven’t been happening in my life, in fact, more the opposite. Work has been going well, I have been going out, and generally feeling very relaxed. Now, normally I would say I find it harder to write when things are going well, because I don’t have anything to rant and rave about. But, that hasn’t been the case either. I have had some times, where I have been really, really down. Those times were I have lay in my bed, and cried my eyes out. That is when I would normally try and write something, but it hasn’t happened.

So today, I had some time and thought I would do something. It is something that makes me feel productive, and made myself sit at the computer for a while. I originally was planning a pinball game that I bought off Steam, but it’s refusing to load. So, that has got my agitation up enough to have a wee ramble. But, I do feel guilty if I don’t check in with this blog every now and then. Sometimes writing nonsense is better than writing nothing, as it helps me get out of whatever funk I may find myself.

Hopefully I get can get things back to normal. But I guess it is important to never stop trying at something. It is knowing that although things may not happen at first try, you are still willing to give stuff another go. That is a good way to look at life, when I think about it. Just be persistent at aiming for things that you want to do. If you simply give up, you will never know what may have happened. Giving up brings with it the regrets you get with missing out.

Happy Hogmanay 

~ Sue ~ 2 Comments

It’s the last day of 2015, and it’s time to be thankful for the year that’s past. Sometime’s it can be hard to find the positives, as it feels we are hard wired to only focus on the negative stuff. 

The celebrations are big here in Scotland. Every major city has it’s own celebrations. From the Edinburgh Street Party to Stonehaven’s Fireball Ceremony, and lots of fireworks. Thousands of people will celebrate it public parties, but celebrating in home is also part of the Hogmanay fun. As soon as the bells toll at midnight, people start knocking on the doors of their neighbours, to wish well for the year ahead. This is called first-footing, as in the first foot through the door. If the first person through your door is tall and dark, it’s seen as good luck. 

One of the most famous part of the Hogmanay celebrations is the singing of Auld Lang Syne written by Rabbie Burns. It’s become popular all over the world when celebrating the new year. So, to help you prepare for the singing of the song, I have put the lyrics below.

  
Thank you if you have read any of my posts this year, I really appreciate it. And I also wish you all a braw Hogmanay and a bonnie start to 2016. Cheers.